Need to get good at Madden 2013 fast
 

Got inebriated at the New Years Eve gathering, told my 16 year old son that I'd whoop him in Madden 2013. Mistake, possibly.

Him: XBOX whiz, typically "completes" games within a day or so (Call of Duty 4, Gears of War 1 and 2, Halo Reach all on hardest levels). He says completing games like Assassin's Creed, Gears of War 3 and Portal 2 were "simple" to complete on the hardest levels. Played 2 years of football very young, but quit and is not a big sports fan -- spends most of his time playing drums in his band and acting like he's not banging his girlfriends under my roof. Knows the XBOX controller like it's part of his body.

Me: Huge sports fan, played football and every other sport until my body broke. I find anything more than a PacMan joystick to be far too confusing.

XBOX advantage: The boy (huge)
Football knowledge advantage: Me (huge)

The point: What is the shortest path to becoming good at Madden 2013/XBOX as fast as possible? I was somehow able to get into the game, but didn't see any "tutorials" or "practice modes" like you see in other games.

Help me, dooshes.

Thanks.

You're so ****ed. I mean... I don't even know where to begin. Just shake your cane and pretend it didn't happen.

I can't. My only saving grace is he's never played the game on XBOX. My wife got it for me for Christmas so I could "do something on the video thing with the boys." My mouth wrote the check, I never let those things bounce.

Come on Caltron, you can give me something here...

Well I hate Madden games for the very reason that could be your saving grace. The best thing you can do is leave a lot of work to the AI. What I mean by that is... when you throw a deep ball let your receiver catch it for you. When your son throws a deep ball let your corner cover it. Don't switch to those guys. Only tackle after the fact and try not to dive for every tackle.. in fact you're probably better off never diving. Football knowledge should at least help you get into and out of nickel defenses vs blitzes and goal line etc at the proper times which should help. As far as basic buttons and how to play I think you can youtube that or find a tutorial in the game or online. ;)

Isn't he used to his father blacking out and saying things he doesn't mean? :dunno:

Your dooshness could not be more total.

My 15 year old kills hundreds of men a day on Xbox (on the weekend, schooldays are off limits) and does unfathomable things on Madden....this is the one area I would never challenge him, even in my most inebriated shakin-like state.

I savor my last one on one BB ball victory against him from three years ago, because now he's 200 lbs. and has 3+ inches on me too. Now I just cut him down to size by pointing out what an utter stink-pig, slob he is.

Just pay him off.

Cash talks.

-

You don't have a chance...

By the way, most of the games you listed were like 2007ish...

Any who, yeah, you're done... Play with Griffin or Cam and hope to get lucky running around/throwing deep...

STEP ONE:

Hire a Korn Ferry XBOX Consultant.

As little help as I expected here, you guys came up with even less. Isn't there some practice mode where I can master like 5 of the 47 buttons, just so I don't stand there and get Delay of Game penalty after Delay of Game penalty?

I don't ask you guys for much.

Eff you FatBoy!

Dude, pickles don't black out. And I pickled myself before you were out of diapers.

Now hit me with a Madden tip. Just one.

Totally ****ed.

Just always play madden's suggestions and don't touch the stick until one of your guys touches it. Then stear him and mash buttons. I beat my nephew doing this.

ok, this I can do.

Anyone who gives me useful advice that delivers positive results can choose another poster to ban for a month. Any poster. A month.

I gave you some dick****.

Here LETMEGOOGLETHATFORYOU.

According to some nerd online "at main screen r stick over to play now i think it gives u option to play offline online and practice"

So to translate I believe you use the right protuberance (called the right analog stick) and.. well.. just flick it to in the direction of "play now" and find the option to practice. Sweet I have my ban candidate all lined up.

ubrnostrum, thanks for the useful advice. Got your PM, no problem, Carlton is toast as soon as I can remember how to access mod tools.

If you're running with the ball, just stay away from the yellow button because it makes you dive to the ground... At least that's what it did in '11. It took me a little while to get what did what, and when.

When on defense, choose a lineman or don't touch the sticks at all.

Eh, I really don't care. It's been a good run.

:byebye:

:D

You've always been jealous of my yellow sweater.

And your moves.