My wife Kathleen recently got together with some old friends Rachel and Clare. They hadn't seen each other since college. They rediscovered each other via Facebook and arranged to meet for lunch in a wine bar.
Rachel arrived first, wearing camel Versace. She ordered a bottle of chilled Chablis. Clare arrived shortly afterward, in gray Chanel. After the required ritualized kisses she joins Rachel in a glass of Chablis. Then my wife walked in, wearing a faded old jacket, blue jeans and Wellington boots. She too shared the wine.
Rachel explained that after leaving school and graduating from Princeton in Classics she met and married Timothy, with whom she has a beautiful daughter. Timothy is a partner in one of New York's leading law firms. They live in a 4000 sq ft co-op on Fifth Avenue , where Susanna, the daughter, attends drama school. They have a second home in the hills above Monte Carlo.
Clare told them how after college, she went on to Harvard Med School and became a well respected gynecologist in Manhattan. Her husband, Clive, is a leading Wall Street investment banker. They live on Long Island and have a second home in Florida.
Kathleen explained that right after she left school at 22 and ran off with her boyfriend... that being me.
She explained that we now run a tropical bird park on Long Island and grow our own vegetables. We don't really have a lot of money but we are happy. She also told them how I can can stand five parrots, side by side, on my willy.
After the third bottle of Chablis, several hours later, Rachel blurted out the her husband isn't Tim, he's Tom and he's a cashier at Wal-Mart. They live in a small condo in Brooklyn and have a travel trailer parked at a nearby a storage facility.
Clare, chastened and encouraged by her old friend's honesty, explained that she and Clive are nurses in Bellevue. They live in Jersey City and vacation at a motel in Orlando.
Seeing how everyone was being so honest, my wife admitted that the fifth parrot has to stand on one leg.