A man is at a bar drinking after work. He gets totally drunk and throws up on himself.
He is very upset that he has to go home and his wife will know he was out drinking.
The guy next to him says not to worry. Put 20 bucks in your shirt pocket and tell your wife the guy next to you threw up all over you and gave you 20 bucks to pay for the cleaning.
The guy gets home and his wife asks what happened? He tells her that a guy threw up on him and gave him 20 bucks to pay for the cleaning. She takes the money out of his pocket and tells him that there is 70 bucks here, what is the other 50 for?
He says - He **** my pants too!!!!