Does having Male Children hurt a Man's Career?

[Alkrotraz]

Just thinking about this on way home. Obama, Clinton, George W. Bush, Jimmy Carter etc. Lots of recent Presidents only have daughters. Also was on a business trip and realized all the male executives only have 1-2 kids in room and most had stay at home wives and lots had daughters. .

But let me just focus on the Son or Sons thing. Of the two big excutives I know with two sons, one had kids later in life after he was a COO, the other had kids in his mid 20's so when he was given his huge promotion in his late 40s a lot of the Dad stuff was gone. So during peak promotion periods of late 30's to late 40's none had Sons in the 6-12 age groups.

In my family the three Dads who have two sons each all have average medicore jobs. Little League, Soccer, Basketball, Cub Scouts, you name it they ran home to be there, less overtime, took jobs with less travel, jobs closer to home etc. All three dads who are in their mid 40s to early 50s make maybe 70k to 130K a year.

The three Dads with only 1 or 2 kids in my family and no sons who are in their mid mid 40s to early 50s all make like 300K to 350K a year. All three took jobs in city, all three work later, all three dont care if they have to travel. They have stay at home wives and girl things, girl scouts, dance, gymanstics are usually right after school and and Dads don't really participate. They can work late, travel,

So do working Dads with sons in Sports/Boy Scouts etc who coach or help out etc get "mommy tracked"?

I know guys I work with who coaches little league so out the door 4:49pm, Turesdays and Thursdays and then it is Cub Scout meeting, or winter basketball try outs etc. They all have good jobs but none are taken too seriously for promotions, really I guess people are thinking big client coming in and guy has to run to coach little league. One guy they really wanted to promote but when he heard "god forbid" he has to work till six pm when he has a larger staff as he can't leave before staff you could see his mind spinning with math and calculating train and bus schedules as how he could make it home in time. He did not get promoted.

So does this happen? Maybe Dads with sons should unite like working Moms do. Are companies flexible for working Dads with Sons like they are for working Mothers with kids? Or do they just think you are that guy, the guy who is happy in his cube running for door at five pm for rest of life with little raises, bonuses and no promotions.

[RaoulDuke]

Never let your sons do organized sports.

Problem solved.

[jetstream23]

[QUOTE=RaoulDuke;4313155]Never let your sons do organized sports.

Problem solved.[/QUOTE]

+1

Instead, keep your sons involved in disorganized French sports.

;)

[Bonhomme Richard]

[QUOTE=jetstream23;4313196]+1

Instead, keep your sons involved in disorganized French sports.

;)[/QUOTE]

Attaboy, son. Don't take your eye off le ball.

[jetstream23]

In all seriousness, this is a good topic. But it simply echoes the general idea of work/life balance. What are your priorities in life? Is it being a good father, being involved in raising your children and working a job that will provide for the family (but not make you rich)? Or, is the career and income the top priority?

Strong performers, valued individuals who are excellent at their jobs should exert leverage with their employer to maintain that balance. You make sacrifices both ways. You can work til 7PM three or four days a week, but you tell the boss that Little League is on Tuesdays and you know what, I'm leaving here at 4PM to go coach it. Make up the time later that night on the laptop or come in early the next day.

I travel quite a bit for work, but I control my own schedule. Most of the time I make sure that if I'm traveling for a week I will drop off my kids at school on Monday and then head to the airport. I'll try to get home by Thursday night if possible to see them for dinner or just prior to bedtime. To a degree this minimizes the number of before/after school times that they won't see me. I'll also work from my home office a few days per week.

In my opinion, it's about priorities and balance.

[jetswin]

You never get anything you miss with your kids back, don't miss it is my advice. If you are productive at work you can be successful and involved with your kids if your boss appreciates your contributions.

To sum it up, no reason you can't have both. :cool:

[PlumberKhan]

[QUOTE=jetstream23;4313214]I'm leaving here at 4PM to go coach it...[/QUOTE]

CPA says that makes you lazy :P

Easy. Just ask your kids. Do you want bigger, better presents? Or do you want to hang out with Dad and play baseball?

[bitonti]

there is a theory that says richer (more successful) parents are more likely to have boys... because girls are actually a better bet from an evolutionary perspective

[url]http://www.dailymail.co.uk/femail/article-1198233/Why-richer-mothers-sons.html[/url]

[Alkrotraz]

The perception is if I am at work I must be working and if I am at work the staff will keep working cause they know boss is there. Come promotion time the old saying is 99% of success is just showing up and the guy the CEO sees at eight am or six pm working gets ahead of guy CEO sees at 4:49 headed out door, granted 4:49 guy might be bringng home three hours of work and six oclock guy might have stayed late to update face book.

This whole theory of face time and perception you have a stay at home wife to support and that wife takes care of kid stuff which leaves you "100%" focused on work sounds good on paper. But in reality sometimes guy is just putzing around office so wife gets stuck with chores at home. He is actually a lousy husband, a poor father and a slow worker. But in the CEO eyes he is management material.

Having sons is another whammy a daughter may say show up to my annual dance recital. But every practice you don't go and girls scouts you never go. A daughter at best once a year or so in some cases you have to leave work on time to go see her do something. A son could be a regular committment. Even funnier the few bosses who run out the door for their kids. Now that I am the boss I do that to make up for lost time. The last thing they want is a second in charge who does it. I don't want to have to come in late to see kids xmas show or leave early cause it is back to school night only to juggle with my back up trying to do the same. And the back up does not want staff doing it.

[PlumberKhan]

[QUOTE=Alkrotraz;4313290]But in reality sometimes guy is just putzing around office so wife gets stuck with chores at home. He is actually a lousy husband, a poor father and a slow worker. But in the CEO eyes he is management material. [/QUOTE]

Of course he's management material. But pushing all the chores to his wife, he's shown that he has exactly what is desirable in a manager...the ability to shirk one's responsibility and make it someone else's problem. :P

What about bringing your kids to work with you? I do it all the time...my daughter was with me yesterday...and of course, made me ride the elevator with her a dozen times :)

[Alkrotraz]

[QUOTE=bitonti;4313247]there is a theory that says richer (more successful) parents are more likely to have boys... because girls are actually a better bet from an evolutionary perspective

[url]http://www.dailymail.co.uk/femail/article-1198233/Why-richer-mothers-sons.html[/url][/QUOTE]

Bruce Willis should have read that study.

[Alkrotraz]

[QUOTE=PlumberKhan;4313306]Of course he's management material. But pushing all the chores to his wife, he's shown that he has exactly what is desirable in a manager...the ability to shirk one's responsibility and make it someone else's problem. :P

What about bringing your kids to work with you? I do it all the time...my daughter was with me yesterday...and of course, made me ride the elevator with her a dozen times :)[/QUOTE]

Are you Plaxico Burress?

[Brooklyn Jet]

I don't think its just sons... Id expand it to dads with kids in organized sports... plenty of dads are leaving at 4:49 to coach soccer, softball, etc. for their daughters.

At the end of the day, maybe Stillborne was right, organized sports are evil. They're keeping the American family down.

[PlumberKhan]

[QUOTE=Alkrotraz;4313317]Are you Plaxico Burress?[/QUOTE]

lol...why? Did he bring his kids to work?

[The Boston Patriot]

You can solve this quandary by 1) Never getting married, 2) Using prophylactics, or 3) (the best option) Hook up with southside and 1 & 2 will never happen so the gender of offspring will be a moot point.

ETA: Stay away from Cro at all costs!

[Alkrotraz]

[QUOTE=PlumberKhan;4313327]lol...why? Did he bring his kids to work?[/QUOTE]

Yep, his kids never saw him play with Giants as not born or too young. As part of deal with Jets he got seats for kids. Every TD Plax gave the ball to his son who had a front row EZ seats.

The Jets were nice to him while in Jail but he also wanted to play near his house so he could take his kids to games. So Plax took his kids to work every sunday.

[Alkrotraz]

Playing Organized Sports or even watching Organized Sports are too large a % of time spent for boys between the ages of 12-21.

A few years ago we hired 15 summer interns. We interviewed Soph and Junior Kids. 14 hired were women. I asked HR were we doing some type of diversity. She said no. But most 19 year old boys had almost no skills to work in an office. We got what do you do, I catch ball, I throw ball, I kick ball. What else I watch TV and Play video games.

The girls who played no sports or watch sports. Had captain debate team, volunteer at nursing home, Class President, School Newspaper, had part time jobs in small business etc. Things that look good in interviews so they scored higher.

The interview for a 19 year old boy is tough. I know at 19 women, video games, alchol, sports, cars were my past times. Not topics you can use in a intern interview at a big bank or broker dealer in manhattan. Girls seem to have more interview friendly interests. Mainly do to lack of focus on sports.

[Beerfish]

Interesting topic considering in many areas of the non western world that are not as affluent it is a much much bigger advantage to have sons to the point of female children have been known to be killed off because they are seen as a drain on the family rather than an asset.

[Martin&theJets]

[QUOTE=Alkrotraz;4313081]Just thinking about this on way home. Obama, Clinton, George W. Bush, Jimmy Carter etc. Lots of recent Presidents only have daughters. Also was on a business trip and realized all the male executives only have 1-2 kids in room and most had stay at home wives and lots had daughters. .

But let me just focus on the Son or Sons thing. Of the two big excutives I know with two sons, one had kids later in life after he was a COO, the other had kids in his mid 20's so when he was given his huge promotion in his late 40s a lot of the Dad stuff was gone. So during peak promotion periods of late 30's to late 40's none had Sons in the 6-12 age groups.

In my family the three Dads who have two sons each all have average medicore jobs. Little League, Soccer, Basketball, Cub Scouts, you name it they ran home to be there, less overtime, took jobs with less travel, jobs closer to home etc. All three dads who are in their mid [B]40s to early 50s make maybe 70k to 130K a year. [/B]
The three Dads with only 1 or 2 kids in my family and no sons who are in their mid mid 40s to early 50s all make like 300K to 350K a year. All three took jobs in city, all three work later, all three dont care if they have to travel. They have stay at home wives and girl things, girl scouts, dance, gymanstics are usually right after school and and Dads don't really participate. They can work late, travel,

So do working Dads with sons in Sports/Boy Scouts etc who coach or help out etc get "mommy tracked"?

I know guys I work with who coaches little league so out the door 4:49pm, Turesdays and Thursdays and then it is Cub Scout meeting, or winter basketball try outs etc. They all have good jobs but none are taken too seriously for promotions, really I guess people are thinking big client coming in and guy has to run to coach little league. One guy they really wanted to promote but when he heard "god forbid" he has to work till six pm when he has a larger staff as he can't leave before staff you could see his mind spinning with math and calculating train and bus schedules as how he could make it home in time. He did not get promoted.

So does this happen? Maybe Dads with sons should unite like working Moms do. Are companies flexible for working Dads with Sons like they are for working Mothers with kids? Or do they just think you are that guy, the guy who is happy in his cube running for door at five pm for rest of life with little raises, bonuses and no promotions.[/QUOTE]


Does in anyone in this thread make more than 100K? Im just curious. 100k a year is a very good salary. If so what do y'all do?

[PlumberKhan]

[QUOTE=Martin&theJets;4313426]Does in anyone in this thread make more than 100K? Im just curious. 100k a year is a very good salary. If so what do y'all do?[/QUOTE]

Interesting fact, 70% of the people who post on JI make at least that.