Home Invasion: Violent Intruder Doots/Faps - Jets Insider.com Forums

1greenNUT · 01-23-2013, 03:06 PM

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2013/0...n_2533967.html

In Florida, there are violent people, naked people, poopers and masturbators -- but rarely is one man the total package.

When Tony and LaDonna Land discovered naked carnival worker Gregory Matthew Bruni on their roof, the night had just begun. Bruni, 21, allegedly assaulted Tony Land, trashed the couple's North Fort Myers Home, and then defecated and masturbated inside the house, WTSP reports.

The Lands told police they were in their bedroom at around 7 p.m. Monday when they heard a noise that sounded like thunder, according to Fox 4 Now. Tony went outside and says he saw Bruni on top of the roof, completely naked. Bruni allegedly jumped down on top of Land, ABC 7 reported, then knocked him over by hitting him in the shoulder.

The Lands say Bruni ran into the house, pulled a big-screen TV off the wall, and spilled the contents of a vacuum onto the floor. Around this time, LaDonna grabbed a gun and began firing at the nude intruder. She missed, and the couple called 911.

"I don't know who the hell he is -- he's naked and he ran into my damn house," Tony can be heard saying on the recording.

The Lands told authorities that after shots were fired, Bruni began whacking the mole in their living room before heading into their son's bedroom to rub some clothing on his face.

When deputies arrived, they attempted to control Bruni, who they say was wildly flailing around and speaking nonsensically. They also discovered that Bruni had defecated on the floor in two spots within the home.

At some point during the ruckus, investigators say, Bruni sucked up the contents of the vacuum, then spit it back out.

Bruni was taken into custody and transported to a hospital for evaluation, where doctors reportedly told deputies they planned to conduct tests to determine "what Bruni was on."

Bruni has been charged with criminal mischief, battery, occupied burglary and resisting arrest without violence.

Let's Recap The Allegations Against Bruni:

Got naked, climbed onto the Lands' roof.

Attacked Tony Lands by jumping on him and hitting his shoulder.

Ran into Lands' house, knocked down a TV and spilled the contents of a vacuum on the floor.

Dodged bullets fired by LaDonna Lands.

Masturbated in the living room.

Rubbed clothes on his face in the Lands' son's room.

Defecated on the floor in two places.

Drank the contents of the vacuum.

Sports · 01-23-2013, 03:21 PM

Someone's pet got loose...

32green · 01-23-2013, 03:49 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by 1greenNUT

Let's Recap The Allegations Against Bruni:

Got naked, climbed onto the Lands' roof.

Attacked Tony Lands by jumping on him and hitting his shoulder.

Ran into Lands' house, knocked down a TV and spilled the contents of a vacuum on the floor.

Dodged bullets fired by LaDonna Lands.

Masturbated in the living room.

Rubbed clothes on his face in the Lands' son's room.

Defecated on the floor in two places.

Drank the contents of the vacuum.

This guy post at JN?

-

frostlich · 01-23-2013, 03:57 PM

Dude gives carnies a bad name.

My guess is the carnie didn't use the bath salts appropriately.

jetswin · 01-23-2013, 04:24 PM

I usually draw the line at drinking vacuum cleaner contents, unless of course they are on the rocks.

Sent from my XT907 using Tapatalk 2

Timmy® · 01-23-2013, 04:35 PM

been there, seen it

when i was young, my friend and i were told by the big kids in our neighborhood
to go into a fort a few blocks over and steal their playboy magazines. we were afraid the kids were going to come back to the fort while we were in there. we couldn't find the magazines at first and my friend was so nervous he had to take a dump - he crapped right on the floor of the fort.

a couple days later, someone crapped on the floor of our fort and ripped off
some magazines and cigarettes.

don't even go there.....

it was on Long Island

chirorob · 01-23-2013, 04:41 PM

You know this guy sits around, shoving bottles of opened vodka up his arse to get drunk. He sounds kind of like a monkey, throwing poo at people when he gets irritated.

adpz · 01-23-2013, 04:47 PM

bath salts

the sensationalistic media's answer to every bizarre crime

Timmy® · 01-23-2013, 05:04 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by 1greenNUT

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2013/0...n_2533967.html

In Florida, there are violent people, naked people, poopers and masturbators -- but rarely is one man the total package.

When Tony and LaDonna Land discovered naked carnival worker Gregory Matthew Bruni on their roof, the night had just begun. Bruni, 21, allegedly assaulted Tony Land, trashed the couple's North Fort Myers Home, and then defecated and masturbated inside the house, WTSP reports.

The Lands told police they were in their bedroom at around 7 p.m. Monday when they heard a noise that sounded like thunder, according to Fox 4 Now. Tony went outside and says he saw Bruni on top of the roof, completely naked. Bruni allegedly jumped down on top of Land, ABC 7 reported, then knocked him over by hitting him in the shoulder.

The Lands say Bruni ran into the house, pulled a big-screen TV off the wall, and spilled the contents of a vacuum onto the floor. Around this time, LaDonna grabbed a gun and began firing at the nude intruder. She missed, and the couple called 911.

"I don't know who the hell he is -- he's naked and he ran into my damn house," Tony can be heard saying on the recording.

The Lands told authorities that after shots were fired, Bruni began whacking the mole in their living room before heading into their son's bedroom to rub some clothing on his face.

When deputies arrived, they attempted to control Bruni, who they say was wildly flailing around and speaking nonsensically. They also discovered that Bruni had defecated on the floor in two spots within the home.

At some point during the ruckus, investigators say, Bruni sucked up the contents of the vacuum, then spit it back out.

Bruni was taken into custody and transported to a hospital for evaluation, where doctors reportedly told deputies they planned to conduct tests to determine "what Bruni was on."

Bruni has been charged with criminal mischief, battery, occupied burglary and resisting arrest without violence.

Let's Recap The Allegations Against Bruni:

Got naked, climbed onto the Lands' roof.

Attacked Tony Lands by jumping on him and hitting his shoulder.

Ran into Lands' house, knocked down a TV and spilled the contents of a vacuum on the floor.

Dodged bullets fired by LaDonna Lands.

Masturbated in the living room.

Rubbed clothes on his face in the Lands' son's room.

Defecated on the floor in two places.

Drank the contents of the vacuum.

82nd Airbourne is back in our country.

Jetworks · 01-23-2013, 05:41 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by 1greenNUT

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2013/0...n_2533967.html

In Florida, there are violent people, naked people, poopers and masturbators -- but rarely is one man the total package.

When Tony and LaDonna Land discovered naked carnival worker Gregory Matthew Bruni on their roof, the night had just begun. Bruni, 21, allegedly assaulted Tony Land, trashed the couple's North Fort Myers Home, and then defecated and masturbated inside the house, WTSP reports.

The Lands told police they were in their bedroom at around 7 p.m. Monday when they heard a noise that sounded like thunder, according to Fox 4 Now. Tony went outside and says he saw Bruni on top of the roof, completely naked. Bruni allegedly jumped down on top of Land, ABC 7 reported, then knocked him over by hitting him in the shoulder.

The Lands say Bruni ran into the house, pulled a big-screen TV off the wall, and spilled the contents of a vacuum onto the floor. Around this time, LaDonna grabbed a gun and began firing at the nude intruder. She missed, and the couple called 911.

"I don't know who the hell he is -- he's naked and he ran into my damn house," Tony can be heard saying on the recording.

The Lands told authorities that after shots were fired, Bruni began whacking the mole in their living room before heading into their son's bedroom to rub some clothing on his face.

When deputies arrived, they attempted to control Bruni, who they say was wildly flailing around and speaking nonsensically. They also discovered that Bruni had defecated on the floor in two spots within the home.

At some point during the ruckus, investigators say, Bruni sucked up the contents of the vacuum, then spit it back out.

Bruni was taken into custody and transported to a hospital for evaluation, where doctors reportedly told deputies they planned to conduct tests to determine "what Bruni was on."

Bruni has been charged with criminal mischief, battery, occupied burglary and resisting arrest without violence.

Let's Recap The Allegations Against Bruni:

Got naked, climbed onto the Lands' roof.

Attacked Tony Lands by jumping on him and hitting his shoulder.

Ran into Lands' house, knocked down a TV and spilled the contents of a vacuum on the floor.

Dodged bullets fired by LaDonna Lands.

Masturbated in the living room.

Rubbed clothes on his face in the Lands' son's room.

Defecated on the floor in two places.

Drank the contents of the vacuum.

Pretty much was able to get the gist of the article from the OPs title and those first tow words of the article.

2milehighJet · 01-23-2013, 05:41 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by frostlich

Dude gives carnies a bad name.

My guess is the carnie didn't use the bath salts appropriately.

Small hands, smells like cabbage.

Borgoguy · 01-23-2013, 05:50 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Jetworks

Pretty much was able to get the gist of the article from the OPs title and those first tow words of the article.

Top 10 lead sentences of all time.

Fishooked · 01-23-2013, 06:00 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by chirorob

You know this guy sits around, shoving bottles of opened vodka up his arse to get drunk. He sounds kind of like a monkey, throwing poo at people when he gets irritated.

Definite butt-chugger....

shakin318 · 01-23-2013, 06:43 PM

ok, it sounds bad, but in my defense, at some point I did answer my cell phone.

Fishooked · 01-23-2013, 07:41 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Timmy®

82nd Airbourne is back in our country.

I missed that gem earlier.

/end thread

The Boston Patriot · 01-23-2013, 09:05 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Sports

Someone's pet got loose...

Is this Tim-m-m-m-m-y?

32green · 01-23-2013, 09:12 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by shakin318

ok, it sounds bad, but in my defense, at some point I did answer my cell phone.

Lol

-

BURGERMIKE · 01-23-2013, 10:18 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by jetswin

I usually draw the line at drinking vacuum cleaner contents, unless of course they are on the rocks.

Sent from my XT907 using Tapatalk 2

Such an Aristocrat

Sports · 01-23-2013, 11:35 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Timmy®

82nd Airbourne is back in our country.

Not yet...36 hours to go.

RaoulDuke · 01-24-2013, 06:00 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Sports

Not yet...36 hours to go.

Where is home exactly?

Please say Vermont.

01-23-2013, 03:06 PM	#1
1greenNUT All League Join Date: Apr 2003 Location: Port Orange, Florida Posts: 2,636	Home Invasion: Violent Intruder Doots/Faps http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2013/0...n_2533967.html In Florida, there are violent people, naked people, poopers and masturbators -- but rarely is one man the total package. When Tony and LaDonna Land discovered naked carnival worker Gregory Matthew Bruni on their roof, the night had just begun. Bruni, 21, allegedly assaulted Tony Land, trashed the couple's North Fort Myers Home, and then defecated and masturbated inside the house, WTSP reports. The Lands told police they were in their bedroom at around 7 p.m. Monday when they heard a noise that sounded like thunder, according to Fox 4 Now. Tony went outside and says he saw Bruni on top of the roof, completely naked. Bruni allegedly jumped down on top of Land, ABC 7 reported, then knocked him over by hitting him in the shoulder. The Lands say Bruni ran into the house, pulled a big-screen TV off the wall, and spilled the contents of a vacuum onto the floor. Around this time, LaDonna grabbed a gun and began firing at the nude intruder. She missed, and the couple called 911. "I don't know who the hell he is -- he's naked and he ran into my damn house," Tony can be heard saying on the recording. The Lands told authorities that after shots were fired, Bruni began whacking the mole in their living room before heading into their son's bedroom to rub some clothing on his face. When deputies arrived, they attempted to control Bruni, who they say was wildly flailing around and speaking nonsensically. They also discovered that Bruni had defecated on the floor in two spots within the home. At some point during the ruckus, investigators say, Bruni sucked up the contents of the vacuum, then spit it back out. Bruni was taken into custody and transported to a hospital for evaluation, where doctors reportedly told deputies they planned to conduct tests to determine "what Bruni was on." Bruni has been charged with criminal mischief, battery, occupied burglary and resisting arrest without violence. Let's Recap The Allegations Against Bruni: Got naked, climbed onto the Lands' roof. Attacked Tony Lands by jumping on him and hitting his shoulder. Ran into Lands' house, knocked down a TV and spilled the contents of a vacuum on the floor. Dodged bullets fired by LaDonna Lands. Masturbated in the living room. Rubbed clothes on his face in the Lands' son's room. Defecated on the floor in two places. Drank the contents of the vacuum.

01-23-2013, 04:47 PM	#8
adpz Veteran Join Date: Jan 2011 Posts: 1,002	bath salts the sensationalistic media's answer to every bizarre crime Last edited by adpz; 01-23-2013 at 04:56 PM.

01-23-2013, 03:21 PM	#2
Sports Home Sweet Home Practice Squad Join Date: Jan 2012 Posts: 480	Someone's pet got loose...

01-23-2013, 03:57 PM	#4
frostlich Get it done Shidzik! All League Join Date: Jul 2005 Posts: 2,963	Dude gives carnies a bad name. My guess is the carnie didn't use the bath salts appropriately.

01-23-2013, 04:24 PM	#5
jetswin stumblin mumblin butt fumblin Board Moderator Jets Insider VIP JetsInsider.com Legend Charter JI Member Join Date: May 1999 Location: Westchester Co. Posts: 35,458	I usually draw the line at drinking vacuum cleaner contents, unless of course they are on the rocks. Sent from my XT907 using Tapatalk 2

01-23-2013, 04:35 PM	#6
Timmy® JI's own Reverend Jim. Hall Of Fame Join Date: Aug 2003 Location: Vermont Posts: 23,469	been there, seen it when i was young, my friend and i were told by the big kids in our neighborhood to go into a fort a few blocks over and steal their playboy magazines. we were afraid the kids were going to come back to the fort while we were in there. we couldn't find the magazines at first and my friend was so nervous he had to take a dump - he crapped right on the floor of the fort. a couple days later, someone crapped on the floor of our fort and ripped off some magazines and cigarettes. don't even go there..... it was on Long Island

01-23-2013, 04:41 PM	#7
chirorob Draft the best available player. All Pro Join Date: Dec 2005 Location: In transit Posts: 5,801	You know this guy sits around, shoving bottles of opened vodka up his arse to get drunk. He sounds kind of like a monkey, throwing poo at people when he gets irritated.

01-23-2013, 06:43 PM	#14
shakin318 Beslubbering beef-witted lout Board Moderator Jets Insider VIP Charter JI Member Join Date: May 1999 Location: Funkytown Posts: 7,170	ok, it sounds bad, but in my defense, at some point I did answer my cell phone.