Enjoy an Ads-Free Jets Insider - Become a Jets Insider VIP!
LATEST JI HEADLINES
TOP STORY
Kellen Winslow Signs One-Year Contract
 
6/14 : Jets set to rebuild around talented trio of d-linemen
6/14 : JetsInsider Radio: Minicamp Wrap-Up Edition (Player Embedded)
6/13 : Drops on Drops on Drops
6/11 : Winslow, Sims-Walker Begin Tryouts
Go Back   Jets Insider.com Forums > Main Forums > The Hangar: Off-Topic Forum
Register FAQ Calendar Mark Forums Read

The Hangar: Off-Topic Forum Pour a cold one and post all off-topic subjects here!

Reply
 
Thread Tools
Old 02-12-2013, 07:35 AM   #21
Fishooked
dealin' out shithands
Hall Of Fame
 
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: teh interwebz
Posts: 24,905
Ever since someone called attention to her torso I can't stop looking at it.
Why I don't know, but it's just.....wide. Almost like she is 3 months pregnant.

Tits, yes the tits, face, and everything else is to die for.
For me though she is not the complete supermodel package.
Fishooked is offline   Reply With Quote
Sponsored Links
Old 02-12-2013, 08:19 AM   #22
32green
neerg23
Board Moderator
Jets Insider VIP
JetsInsider.com Legend
 
Join Date: Sep 2005
Location: The depths of Despair.
Posts: 37,714
Quote:
Originally Posted by Fishooked View Post
Ever since someone called attention to her torso I can't stop looking at it.


She has toneless puppet legs and her hips extend too far up her torso.

Its as if the creator lost interest after perfecting her down to the fifth rib or so.

Either way, she is a few short years away from total sloppiness, meth addiction and stealing detergent from Walmart.

Strictly a rental.

-
32green is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 02-12-2013, 08:22 AM   #23
Fishooked
dealin' out shithands
Hall Of Fame
 
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: teh interwebz
Posts: 24,905
Quote:
Originally Posted by 32green View Post


She has toneless puppet legs and her hips extend too far up her torso.

Its as if the creator lost interest after perfecting her down to the fifth rib or so.

Either way, she is a few short years away from total sloppiness, meth addiction and stealing detergent from Walmart.

Strictly a rental.

-


No one paints a picture like 32green.
Fishooked is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 02-12-2013, 08:40 AM   #24
titanbuoy
medium rare
Practice Squad
 
Join Date: Oct 2005
Posts: 279
Quote:
Originally Posted by 32green View Post


She has toneless puppet legs and her hips extend too far up her torso.

Its as if the creator lost interest after perfecting her down to the fifth rib or so.

Either way, she is a few short years away from total sloppiness, meth addiction and stealing detergent from Walmart.

Strictly a rental.

-
From reading your posts critiquing the ladies, it would seem there are perhaps four women on earth the you would deem fappable (maybe five tops). It's a wonder you were able to find a spouse... no doubt she must be smokin' (if not inflatable)

Jus sayin'
titanbuoy is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 02-12-2013, 08:46 AM   #25
frostlich
Get it done Shidzik!
All League
 
Join Date: Jul 2005
Posts: 3,010
Quote:
Originally Posted by 32green View Post
lol


You neighbors will be treated to the sight of dozens of terrified loin-clothed midgets desperately heaving themselves out of your windows.

-
Weird Science. Very weird science.

Dreading the day when somebody starts a "Post a scan of yourself" thread. Photoshops will be tame by comparison.
frostlich is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 02-12-2013, 08:49 AM   #26
Fishooked
dealin' out shithands
Hall Of Fame
 
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: teh interwebz
Posts: 24,905
Quote:
Originally Posted by titanbuoy View Post
From reading your posts critiquing the ladies, it would seem there are perhaps four women on earth the you would deem fappable (maybe five tops). It's a wonder you were able to find a spouse... no doubt she must be smokin' (if not inflatable)

Jus sayin'
I think for us married schlubs rating women is a sliding scale, nothing is ever black and white.

In real life, as if she were somewhat more relateable, such as a neighbors wife, she's a definite 10, 11.

However in the non-reality that is the internet and super-judgemental-ness, where the innernets are filled with beautiful women, I'd put her at a 9.
Fishooked is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 02-12-2013, 08:49 AM   #27
32green
neerg23
Board Moderator
Jets Insider VIP
JetsInsider.com Legend
 
Join Date: Sep 2005
Location: The depths of Despair.
Posts: 37,714
Quote:
Originally Posted by titanbuoy View Post
From reading your posts critiquing the ladies, it would seem there are perhaps four women on earth the you would deem fappable (maybe five tops). It's a wonder you were able to find a spouse... no doubt she must be smokin' (if not inflatable)

Jus sayin'
I'm purely an armchair QB with no game.

If I ever actually saw her in person, I'd prolly lose control of every orifice.

Its fun watching the consternation posts when a "flaw" is exploited.

32green is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 02-12-2013, 08:56 AM   #28
Borgoguy
On a mission to educate and enthrall.
Banned
 
Join Date: Sep 2007
Posts: 1,569
Quote:
Originally Posted by titanbuoy View Post
From reading your posts critiquing the ladies, it would seem there are perhaps four women on earth the you would deem fappable (maybe five tops). It's a wonder you were able to find a spouse... no doubt she must be smokin' (if not inflatable)

Jus sayin'
To be fair, 32 is not entirely wrong. It was I who--a few years ago--pointed out that Upton (a goddess) had a problem with weight and a disproportionately larger mid-section.

Not massive by any means, just not in line with standards of the modern modeling industry. Actually, several of her modeling contemporaries sat Kate down and told her that, if she wants to be a model for the long term, she needed to start eating properly and get her weight in check. Below is a shot of Kate from that time:




Here's a great example of a slightly larger, more toned, Upton still with the "thicker" mid-section. She's still a knockout, if not a tad sloppy around the middle.



Finally, an image from the recently released 2013 SI Swimsuit Issue. Note how she is in excellent shape, but still has an "odd" middle (also why she is often shot from the side). Not that it would not fit perfectly around my face, but still.


Last edited by Borgoguy; 02-12-2013 at 09:12 AM. Reason: Restore image.
Borgoguy is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 02-12-2013, 08:57 AM   #29
Fishooked
dealin' out shithands
Hall Of Fame
 
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: teh interwebz
Posts: 24,905
Quote:
Originally Posted by 32green View Post
I'm purely an armchair QB with no game.

If I ever actually saw her in person, I'd prolly lose control of every orifice.

Its fun watching the consternation posts when a "flaw" is exploited.


Co-signed. I have no game either.

I can barely mutter a befuddled 'Hello' towards the wimmens I have crushes on at the office, and most of those women would barely qualify at 5 or 6s.
Just sayin'...
Fishooked is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 02-12-2013, 08:57 AM   #30
DDNYjets
Hall Of Fame
 
Join Date: Oct 2011
Location: New York
Posts: 12,559
Stop worrying about the future. Enjoy Ms. Upton in her current glory. Her only "flaw" is that she was once associated with that loser ButtFumble-ing putz Mark Sanchez.
DDNYjets is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 02-12-2013, 09:00 AM   #31
32green
neerg23
Board Moderator
Jets Insider VIP
JetsInsider.com Legend
 
Join Date: Sep 2005
Location: The depths of Despair.
Posts: 37,714
Quote:
Originally Posted by Fishooked View Post
However in the non-reality that is the internet and super-judgemental-ness, where the innernets are filled with beautiful women, I'd put her at a 9.
meh. 10 from head to boops, 6 from boops to feet, for a median score of upper 7ish.

-
32green is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 02-12-2013, 09:01 AM   #32
southside
Forever Awesome
All Pro
 
Join Date: Jul 2009
Posts: 8,938
Quote:
Originally Posted by Borgoguy View Post
Finally, an image from the recently released 2013 SI Swimsuit Issue. Note how she is in excellent shape, but still has an "odd" middle (also why she is often shot from the side). Not that it would not fit perfectly around my face, but still.
More than likely photoshopped.

Either way, I'd attack that ass like it stole something.
southside is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 02-12-2013, 09:01 AM   #33
southside
Forever Awesome
All Pro
 
Join Date: Jul 2009
Posts: 8,938
Quote:
Originally Posted by 32green View Post
meh. 10 from head to boops, 6 from boops to feet, for a median score of upper 7ish.

-
Umm... the median would be 8. That's not even hard math.
southside is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 02-12-2013, 09:08 AM   #34
32green
neerg23
Board Moderator
Jets Insider VIP
JetsInsider.com Legend
 
Join Date: Sep 2005
Location: The depths of Despair.
Posts: 37,714
Quote:
Originally Posted by Borgoguy View Post
Kermit the frog legs.

-
32green is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 02-12-2013, 09:10 AM   #35
Dcat
Out here we is stoned immaculate
Jets Insider VIP
 
Join Date: Feb 2006
Posts: 8,174
Quote:
Originally Posted by Fishooked View Post
Ever since someone called attention to her torso I can't stop looking at it.
Why I don't know, but it's just.....wide. Almost like she is 3 months pregnant.

Tits, yes the tits, face, and everything else is to die for.
For me though she is not the complete supermodel package.
geezus. She's a supermodel with "slut appeal". What more could anyone want? Damn.
Dcat is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 02-12-2013, 09:11 AM   #36
Borgoguy
On a mission to educate and enthrall.
Banned
 
Join Date: Sep 2007
Posts: 1,569
Quote:
Originally Posted by southside View Post
More than likely photoshopped.

Either way, I'd attack that ass like it stole something.
Duh. Of course. Every magazine image you see, of any model, is tweaked in some way or another. That said, Upton is in better shape now than she was
two years ago.
Borgoguy is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 02-12-2013, 09:14 AM   #37
32green
neerg23
Board Moderator
Jets Insider VIP
JetsInsider.com Legend
 
Join Date: Sep 2005
Location: The depths of Despair.
Posts: 37,714
Quote:
Originally Posted by Borgoguy View Post
Upton is in better shape now than she was
two years ago.
Granted, but she is a two week taco-binge away from permanent hanging pouch territory. She would have to be kept under strict supervision.

-
32green is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 02-12-2013, 09:18 AM   #38
Fishooked
dealin' out shithands
Hall Of Fame
 
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: teh interwebz
Posts: 24,905
Quote:
Originally Posted by Dcat View Post
geezus. She's a supermodel with "slut appeal". What more could anyone want? Damn.
She's not a brunette.
Fishooked is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 02-12-2013, 09:20 AM   #39
32green
neerg23
Board Moderator
Jets Insider VIP
JetsInsider.com Legend
 
Join Date: Sep 2005
Location: The depths of Despair.
Posts: 37,714
Quote:
Originally Posted by Fishooked View Post
She's not a brunette.


Kelly Brook




Now that.....is a 10.

-
32green is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 02-12-2013, 09:20 AM   #40
Borgoguy
On a mission to educate and enthrall.
Banned
 
Join Date: Sep 2007
Posts: 1,569
Quote:
Originally Posted by 32green View Post
Granted, but she is a two week taco-binge away from permanent hanging pouch territory. She would have to be kept under strict supervision.

-
Unchecked, Upton will always have the proclivity toward weight gain. She hit the genetic lottery in terms of beauty. But weight issues are her one visible flaw.
Borgoguy is offline   Reply With Quote
Reply

Bookmarks

Thread Tools

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off

Forum Jump


Enjoy an Ads-Free Jets Insider - Become a Jets Insider VIP!

All times are GMT -4. The time now is 04:47 AM.



Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.8.7
Copyright ©2000 - 2013, vBulletin Solutions, Inc.
Copyright ©1999 - 2013, JetsInsider.com LTD