Page 160 of 1016 FirstFirst ... 60110150158159160161162170210260660 ... LastLast
Results 3,181 to 3,200 of 20317

Thread: OT - It's The Funny/Stupid/Cool Pic Thread :D

  1. #3181
    Banned
    Join Date
    Jun 2007
    Posts
    11,169
    Post Thanks / Like









  2. #3182
    Practice Squad
    Join Date
    Oct 2005
    Posts
    418
    Post Thanks / Like
    http://www.funnyordie.com/articles/6...ures_and_words

    15 Ways To Spice Up Your Love Making - By Your Aunt Diane
    By YOUR AUNT DIANE August 10, 2011


    I'm Your Aunt Diane, an artist and jewelry designer in Santa Fe, New Mexico. Everyone knows the sexual basics, like how the most erotic song you can make love to is an audio track of yourself describing a heavy desert rain, but I want to share some lesser-known tips with you. May these help you achieve the physical, emotional and spiritual climax you deserve:

    1. Spice up your lovemaking and go green by adding a trellis to your bedroom.

    2. Leave a treat for your partner to find in the morning by painting a gecko on their perineum while they sleep.

    3. Try making love in a canyon! But remember, it takes roughly an hour for an echo to bounce back inside of one and for wolves to track the scent of coitus, so make sure to scream, “run!” right as you start to undress.

    4. Forgo French kissing for the more erotic Salvadorian kissing, where your tongue licks around the outside of the mouth.

    5. Never trim your poor pubic pelt into something like a “landing strip”. Every man I have ever been with has loved my “dream catcher”.

    6. Make love to at least one seventy-year-old Comanche river boat captain.

    7. Try giving your genitals a festive look by draping them in Genital Tinsel. You can pick up a bag at my jewelry kiosk, located at the Santa Fe Outlets, right behind the disgusting corporate behemoth California Pizza Kitchen.‬

    8. Bottle your own natural erotic lubricant. I make mine out of a mixture of coconut oil, yam pulp, and underbreast perspiration.

    9. Make love as part of an art installation. The sex, combined with the public statement you are making, will combine for a truly powerful climax.

    10. The closer a man’s naked body is to looking like Edward James Olmos, a jagged brown sedimentary rock, or both, the more intense the love-making will be.

    11. Find ways to add sexual pleasure to other daily activities! For example, during yoga, I recommend doing a sun salutation with a completely erect penis inside of you.

    12. Sex doesn't have to occur only in the bedroom, and it rarely should. Try hosting an adult slip-n-slide in your front yard. Tell everyone to bring a gallon of herbal Chokecherry body lotion and a zest for touching!

    13. Give up utensils and eat only out of the folds of your lover's skin. (Soups might be difficult.)

    14. Being pregnant does not have to impede sexual expression. Simply stop by The Learning Annex and sign up for one of my Tantric Lamaze classes.

    15. Make and then swallow a miniature wind chime. With each thrust of your pelvis, it will provide beautiful music for your love-making session. The chime might tear up your esophagus on the way down, but music heals ALL wounds!

  3. #3183
    Hall Of Fame
    Join Date
    Nov 2004
    Location
    LI
    Posts
    20,155
    Post Thanks / Like
    Try hosting an adult slip-n-slide in your front yard.

    I've tried the Sit&Spin, and Twister, but never this. Thanks Aunt Diane!

  4. #3184
    All League
    Join Date
    Apr 2007
    Location
    Breckenridge, CO
    Posts
    3,907
    Post Thanks / Like
    for you C.H.E's


  5. #3185
    All League
    Join Date
    Oct 2005
    Posts
    3,906
    Post Thanks / Like

  6. #3186
    JetsInsider.com Legend
    Join Date
    Sep 2006
    Location
    凸(⊙▂⊙✖ )
    Posts
    30,768
    Post Thanks / Like
    Quote Originally Posted by Dimitri_0515 View Post









    Does battered husband syndrome really have to begin on their wedding day? Really? Stupid ****ing cvnts.

  7. #3187
    Board Moderator
    Jets Insider VIP
    JetsInsider.com Legend
    Charter JI Member

    Join Date
    May 1999
    Location
    Westchester Co.
    Posts
    37,855
    Post Thanks / Like
    Quote Originally Posted by titanbuoy View Post
    8. Bottle your own natural erotic lubricant. I make mine out of a mixture of coconut oil, yam pulp, and underbreast perspiration.


  8. #3188
    All Pro
    Join Date
    Jan 2006
    Location
    In The Cone of Doom
    Posts
    6,951
    Post Thanks / Like
    I make mine out of axle grease, ear wax, crack sweat, and Dr. Pepper. Never fails to impress the ladies.

    8. Bottle your own natural erotic lubricant. I make mine out of a mixture of coconut oil, yam pulp, and underbreast perspiration.

    Quote Originally Posted by jetswin View Post

  9. #3189
    JetsInsider.com Legend
    Join Date
    Sep 2006
    Location
    凸(⊙▂⊙✖ )
    Posts
    30,768
    Post Thanks / Like
    So SOUR!!!!


  10. #3190
    JetsInsider.com Legend
    Join Date
    Sep 2006
    Location
    凸(⊙▂⊙✖ )
    Posts
    30,768
    Post Thanks / Like

  11. #3191
    Mod Friend to JI Legends
    Join Date
    Oct 2005
    Location
    SF via Strong Island
    Posts
    29,939
    Post Thanks / Like
    Quote Originally Posted by Fishooked View Post
    That is fantastic.

  12. #3192
    JetsInsider.com Legend
    Join Date
    Sep 2006
    Location
    凸(⊙▂⊙✖ )
    Posts
    30,768
    Post Thanks / Like

  13. #3193
    JetsInsider.com Legend
    Join Date
    Sep 2006
    Location
    凸(⊙▂⊙✖ )
    Posts
    30,768
    Post Thanks / Like

  14. #3194
    Jets Insider VIP
    Join Date
    Jan 2006
    Posts
    10,846
    Post Thanks / Like

  15. #3195
    Jets Insider VIP
    Join Date
    Jan 2006
    Posts
    10,846
    Post Thanks / Like

  16. #3196
    JetsInsider.com Legend
    Join Date
    Sep 2006
    Location
    凸(⊙▂⊙✖ )
    Posts
    30,768
    Post Thanks / Like

  17. #3197
    Hall Of Fame
    Join Date
    Aug 2005
    Posts
    16,697
    Post Thanks / Like

  18. #3198
    Hall Of Fame
    Join Date
    Aug 2005
    Posts
    16,697
    Post Thanks / Like

  19. #3199
    Hall Of Fame
    Join Date
    Aug 2005
    Posts
    16,697
    Post Thanks / Like

  20. #3200
    Hall Of Fame
    Join Date
    Nov 2004
    Location
    LI
    Posts
    20,155
    Post Thanks / Like




    ---------------

    "I'm down for PEANUT BUTTER AND JELLY sandwichs 100 BILLION percent of the time!"

    yeah, me too.

Tags for this Thread

Bookmarks

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •  

Follow Us