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  1. #21
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    "I never stole money from you for drugs". That was ackwardly dropped into your letter. Is there an addiction issue driving her desire to get out of the marriage?

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  3. #23
    Quote Originally Posted by RutgersJetFan View Post
    Call up any investment firms or banks you have joint accounts in and inform them of the divorce. Ask them to put a freeze on the account(s) as well. Most investment firms (not sure about banks though) have divorce policies where they'll automatically freeze accounts upon notification of a divorce to protect both parties.
    This got pushed to the bottom of the first page, but I can't stress this enough. As someone who recently used to do death and divorce settlement for a large investment firm, I can tell you without a doubt that this is good advice. If she has access to any of your assets, you need to do everything possible to put a hold on that for the time being.

    Also, sorry to hear about everything.
    Last edited by RutgersJetFan; 12-29-2007 at 10:35 AM.

  4. #24
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    It was the Internetz porn, wasnt it?



    Just tell her "at least I didnt go back to NY and blow our snow-thrower dough on a high priced hooker"


    Anyhoo, you sound like a good guy. I dont know what real solace you'll find amongst the JI faithful (witness my barbaric post) but maybe some words from other guys that have posted their wives photos and then gotten divorced after a few months will help.

    Good luck, bro
    Last edited by 32green; 12-29-2007 at 11:08 AM.

  5. #25
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    Quote Originally Posted by jetsfanohio View Post
    Well.........Im getting divorced. Married 7/7/07 Dated for 6 yrs. Any help is appreciated.
    What is the root cause that's leading to the divorce?

    You or her making this happen?

    Is there any infidelity?

    Did the problem leading to the divorce begin before you got married or after?

    I'm truly sorry. Please give us some more detail so we can be good friends to you in your time of need.

    And something I will let you know: There is life on the other side. My first marriage ended after 16 months. She was beautiful, but a complete b'tch and an awful person. Within a year an office relationship developed and I haven't had an unhappy day in the last 14 years. Be strong.

    SAR I

  6. #26
    Quote Originally Posted by HERDFAN1 View Post
    "I never stole money from you for drugs". That was ackwardly dropped into your letter. Is there an addiction issue driving her desire to get out of the marriage?

    yeah.....it seems there is something he did that she can't forgive him for.

  7. #27
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    Quote Originally Posted by RutgersJetFan View Post
    This got pushed to the bottom of the first page, but I can't stress this enough. As someone who recently used to do death and divorce settlement for a large investment firm, I can tell you without a doubt that this is good advice. If she has access to any of your assets, you need to do everything possible to put a hold on that for the time being.
    Close out any joint credit cards immediately!!!!!!!!!! Good luck better times ahead.

  8. #28
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    What happened in NY, Cle, and Pitts? You mentioned you never stole money from her for drugs. Was there an addiction involved? Drug binges? Did you cheat on her in NY, Cle, and Pitts? What happend?

  9. #29
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    Quote Originally Posted by neckdemon View Post
    yeah.....it seems there is something he did that she can't forgive him for.
    But then he says:

    "And that's why I willing to alter my lifestyle to save you."

    SAR I

  10. #30
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    I was divorced 8 years ago with three kids. Worst thing I've ever endured, and still adhusting. 95% of my angst was watching my kids go through it. I initially lost custody because one of my ex wifes male friends got injured.

    But 6 years later I have a wonderful new wife(best friend in the world) another kid and custody of all my kids. Never give up man. I used to think if I didn't have the kids I would just never talk to her again and move on. I couldn't because the kids.

    My advice to you... don't give up too soon, but don't promise to change and jump through hoops for the rest of your life. If you have to move to on, get help, getdrunk, or counseling or whatever, do it. With or without her their is a better you and a better life to be had.

    Best of luck bro

  11. #31
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    Quote Originally Posted by SAR I View Post
    What is the root cause that's leading to the divorce?

    You or her making this happen?

    Is there any infidelity?

    Did the problem leading to the divorce begin before you got married or after?

    I'm truly sorry. Please give us some more detail so we can be good friends to you in your time of need.

    And something I will let you know: There is life on the other side. My first marriage ended after 16 months. She was beautiful, but a complete b'tch and an awful person. Within a year an office relationship developed and I haven't had an unhappy day in the last 14 years. Be strong.

    SAR I

    Are you feeling OK? Someone is talking about their wife and you don't ask for any pictures?



    Don't really know what to tell you jetsfanohio, just do whatever it is that makes you happy.

  12. #32
    Can I have her number?

  13. #33

  14. #34
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    Quote Originally Posted by RutgersJetFan View Post
    Call up any investment firms or banks you have joint accounts in and inform them of the divorce. Ask them to put a freeze on the account(s) as well. Most investment firms (not sure about banks though) have divorce policies where they'll automatically freeze accounts upon notification of a divorce to protect both parties.
    or drain the accounts ASAP....

  15. #35
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    I guess it's a sign of the times, but I think it's odd the two of you use e-mail to discuss such heavy issues in the first place.

    My wife and I forward each other funny office jokes that circulate around, but we never use e-mail to "talk"


    .02

  16. #36
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    I feel like I know you for years reading that. I know about your friedns, parents, and dogs..

  17. #37
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    Quote Originally Posted by samwise View Post
    I guess it's a sign of the times, but I think it's odd the two of you use e-mail to discuss such heavy issues in the first place.

    My wife and I forward each other funny office jokes that circulate around, but we never use e-mail to "talk"


    .02
    Email has definitely evolved, but it's no substitute for face to face time.

    That struck me as well. Communication is key.

  18. #38
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    Thats sucks, man. I'm sorry to hear that.

    My parents will be going through this soon, I'm sure. I think they are just waiting until my sister gets to college. I wish they wouldn't. It makes it so much harder for everyone. I hate this ****.

  19. #39
    Your post brought me back to my college days and the female I dated. It was a serious relationship, but we broke up several times with me begging her to take me back. I think back on this situation often and always bemoan my stupidity and lack of balls to tell her to take a hike. I wasted so many years when I could have been dating (read: fu**ing) other women, and generally having a better time in college than I did. Further, if I had stayed with this person, I would never have met my wife, who I have been together with since 1982. My advice to you: as difficult as it will be to do, move on. Serious problems in relationships don't magically go away...they always pop back up and then you break up anyway, wasting all that time. Find you next great love.

  20. #40
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    Arrow

    Best 2 cents I can give you would be-

    Try to think with your head and not your heart. What feels the best to you is most of the time the wrong way to go.

    DON'T call her or do nice things for her while this is going on. Doing things that you think will show her how much you care will only push her away faster. It sucks but what feels the worst to you is what is best right now. Don't call,text,email or anything.
    Go out with your friends and try to get her off your mind. It's not easy but it's whats best in the long run. Good luck.

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