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Thread: Ot; Neighbor Advice....

  1. #1
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    Ot; Neighbor Advice....

    I need some guidance....

    I moved to an incorporated village a couple of years ago and one of my neighbors is one of the town commissioners...

    He is an older gentleman (widower) who is living with his daughter in law and her two teen sons. The son in law passed away, hence the living arrangements.

    The "Commissioner" is one of these selfless guys that is never home and helping out all over town. His daughter in law works during the day.

    Well here it is. The Commissioners house has become "hang-out central" for the high school kid and all of his friends. Every day four-five cars pull up and they all pile out. Recently I've seen a big increase in the amount of beer drinking as these kids are virtually unsupervised.

    I've also witnessed what I believe to be Marijuana purchases as cars roll up and kids run out and do essentially a hand to hand through the car window. (I'm assuming the kids are buying from roving dealers or friends)

    There are a LOT of small kids on my block and this is what concerns me.

    I'm routinely finding beer cans, glassines and even condom box's on my lawn or in the street in front of my house.

    I do not know the Commissioner and this is not how I want to introduce myself!

    The easy answer is "call the cops", I know.

    However I am leaning towards writing an anonymous, very respectful, detailed letter which will give him the opportunity to straighten this out without fan fare.

    This bothers me because otherwise this is a real nice town for kids and this guy has a great rep.


    Any thoughts?:confused:

  2. #2
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    [QUOTE=32green;2517968]I'm routinely finding beer cans, glassines and even condom box's on my lawn or in the street in front of my house.

    [/QUOTE]

    :eek: that's horrendous

  3. #3
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    I agree with the letter idea, but I would add a few pictures showing HIS house being used that way. I would assume it is all cleaned up before he gets home?

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    A letter might anger him, and it would be his grandkid's word against Mr. Anonymous Letter Writer.

    Call the 5-0, let them deal with it. It's the easiest way to get the drugs and underage drinking off your street asap.

  5. #5
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    Letter first, then Cops, if no improvement. I hate to be in favor of the "narc" mindset, but after I had kids, my whole world has changed. Got to protect the little ones.:D

    BTW, Make sure that letter is VERY anonymous, or you may be answered with keyscratches, and vandalism. :eek:

  6. #6
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    I would go introduce myself and just tell him that this isn't how you wanted to meet him but there are concerns that you have that he should know about. Then show him the pictures and give him a set.

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    [QUOTE=pauliec;2517982]A letter might anger him, and it would be his grandkid's word against Mr. Anonymous Letter Writer.

    Call the 5-0, let them deal with it. It's the easiest way to get the drugs and underage drinking off your street asap.[/QUOTE]

    I would agree since he's living in an incorporated village (if it's what I think it is).

    The cops used to harass me and my friends for the same stuff, but we covered a lot of different neighborhoods so they really couldn't pinpoint us as easily.

    If they get busted in a place like that it'll scare them away for a while at least.

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    [QUOTE=32green;2517968]I need some guidance....

    I moved to an incorporated village a couple of years ago and one of my neighbors is one of the town commissioners...

    He is an older gentleman (widower) who is living with his daughter in law and her two teen sons. The son in law passed away, hence the living arrangements.

    The "Commissioner" is one of these selfless guys that is never home and helping out all over town. His daughter in law works during the day.

    Well here it is. The Commissioners house has become "hang-out central" for the high school kid and all of his friends. Every day four-five cars pull up and they all pile out. Recently I've seen a big increase in the amount of beer drinking as these kids are virtually unsupervised.

    I've also witnessed what I believe to be Marijuana purchases as cars roll up and kids run out and do essentially a hand to hand through the car window. (I'm assuming the kids are buying from roving dealers or friends)

    There are a LOT of small kids on my block and this is what concerns me.

    I'm routinely finding beer cans, glassines and even condom box's on my lawn or in the street in front of my house.

    I do not know the Commissioner and this is not how I want to introduce myself!

    The easy answer is "call the cops", I know.

    However I am leaning towards writing an anonymous, very respectful, detailed letter which will give him the opportunity to straighten this out without fan fare.

    This bothers me because otherwise this is a real nice town for kids and this guy has a great rep.


    Any thoughts?:confused:[/QUOTE]nip this...u need to keep ur pimp hand strong...don't let this linger.

  9. #9
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    I think the letter will work. If the kid is a senior in highschool you'll probably only have to deal with it till the end of summer. Assuming he or the majority of friends go away to school.

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    I think the anonymous letter is the best way here. To confront someone more directly could drag you into more trouble than you want. In the first place, there will, of course, be bald-faced denial by the kids, letter or no letter. But if the miscreants in question - and their "pals" - get wind of who is ratting them out, your life could turn into a living hell. JMO.

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    Letter to Commish and the Board

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    [QUOTE=pauliec;2517982]A letter might anger him, and it would be his grandkid's word against Mr. Anonymous Letter Writer.

    Call the 5-0, let them deal with it. It's the easiest way to get the drugs and underage drinking off your street asap.[/QUOTE]

    i disagree - why call the cops and embarrass the guy when if he knew about it it sounds like it would end immediately? letter is the way to go -

  13. #13
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    [QUOTE=oh well okay;2518000]i disagree - why call the cops and embarrass the guy when if he knew about it it sounds like it would end immediately? letter is the way to go -[/QUOTE]

    And I'm sure the kids aren't bad kids, its just what happens in Highschool, wouldn't want them in trouble with the law.

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    I would talk to him, if he loves the town like you describe, he should be appalled by what is transpiring and work to rectify it. But I can see how it can be a sticky situation. Have a conversation with him and feel him out, if he seems like you can talk to him, then bring it up delicately.

    It's tough, luckily my neighbor, works in the Village offices and somewhat connected, but is very nice. When we first moved in her son had a party that went til almost 5am and pretty loud. I talked to the kid who was in his mid 20's and he was respectful and it went well. Do you feel you can talk with the kid first?

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    Yeah, don't call the cops, that's a dick move.

    Just go over there and tell him what's going on, it will stop.

  16. #16
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    [QUOTE=sdJETSetter;2517985]Letter first, then Cops, if no improvement. I hate to be in favor of the "narc" mindset, but after I had kids, my whole world has changed. Got to protect the little ones.:D

    BTW, Make sure that letter is VERY anonymous, or you may be answered with keyscratches, and vandalism. :eek:[/QUOTE]

    This is a small town and the kids mother works for the Police Dept.:eek: and every cop knows the Commissioners house. (he's NOT the Police Commisioner, lol,)
    Just the way it is. That is why I was leaning towards the letter. He doesnt get embarrassed by the cops coming to him about it....it stays in house.

    I hate to be a narc about it too, but this is escalating and the kids are borderline "gangsta" wannabees.

    I get the feeling all these kids parents have no idea that these kids are unsupervised at the COmmissioners house, and one of these kids is going to wreck a car and then there will be all sorts of recriminations.

    My stomach is in a knot.
    Last edited by 32green; 04-30-2008 at 05:01 PM.

  17. #17
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    If the Mother is attractive I would suggest discussing the situation with her. You might send YJF as your emissary?

  18. #18
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    Can't beat em... join em :yes:

  19. #19
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    So basically your one of those cranky neigbors.

  20. #20
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    [QUOTE=JetStream;2518004] Do you feel you can talk with the kid first?[/QUOTE]

    Every other word out of this kids mouth is the N word. He's a white kid, 90 lbs. soaking wet. So NO.

    Actual conversation witnessed as he's walking past my house one day with his black friend:

    (pointing at houses as he walks) "I dont know this N****r, that N****R, I aint spoke to that N*****R since he moved in (that would be me).

    Thats what this kid is like.

    Also, I have never actually spoken to the Commissioner and I'm afraid that if I do, he will inadvertently give me up to this punk and then I will have to worry about that. Thats why the letter sounds better.

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