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Thread: Joke thread

  1. #141
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    for southside








  2. #142
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    Quote Originally Posted by Fishooked View Post
    for southside








  3. #143
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    Quote Originally Posted by Fishooked View Post
    for southside








  4. #144
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    Why did the monkey fall out of the tree?

    Because it was dead.

  5. #145
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    Quote Originally Posted by southside View Post
    I heard this joke told but it was his sister instead of his Aunt Gina.
    Thanks, Mr. Helper.


  6. #146
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    I accidentally swallowed some Scrabble tiles the other day... I'm afraid when they finally pass it will spell disaster.

    Sent from my XT907 using Tapatalk 2

  7. #147
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    Quote Originally Posted by jetswin View Post
    I accidentally swallowed some Scrabble tiles the other day... I'm afraid when they finally pass it will spell disaster.

    Sent from my XT907 using Tapatalk 2
    Hey now!

    They are building a highway in front of my house...now I have to leave my driveway doing 60.

  8. #148
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    Quote Originally Posted by 32green View Post
    They are building a highway in front of my house...now I have to leave my driveway doing 60.
    this was worse than "where are all the scissors?"

  9. #149
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    Joke: Rex Ryan and the NY Jets

  10. #150
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    Quote Originally Posted by Timmy® View Post
    this was worse than "where are all the scissors?"
    Thats Wright.


    -

  11. #151
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    Quote Originally Posted by 32green View Post
    Thats Wright.


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    that's wr-i-i-i-g-h-t.t.

    that would have been genius

    or however you do that

  12. #152
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    Quote Originally Posted by Timmy® View Post
    that's wr-i-i-i-g-h-t.t.

    that would have been genius

    or however you do that

  13. #153
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    Quote Originally Posted by jetswin View Post
    I accidentally swallowed some Scrabble tiles the other day... I'm afraid when they finally pass it will spell disaster.

    Sent from my XT907 using Tapatalk 2
    No lie, my dog ate one of those small snicker bars and the next time I walked her she took a dump and plastered on the side of her doot, read as clear as ya please "Snickers". Seriously.

  14. #154
    Quote Originally Posted by chesapeakejet View Post
    No lie, my dog ate one of those small snicker bars and the next time I walked her she took a dump and plastered on the side of her doot, read as clear as ya please "Snickers". Seriously.
    one of my dogs has separation anxiety issues and will eat pretty much anything when my wife and I aren't home.


    clothespins, pieces of doghouse, pieces of chew toys... picking up his dootz in the yard is my version of CSI

  15. #155
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    Quote Originally Posted by chesapeakejet View Post
    No lie, my dog ate one of those small snicker bars and the next time I walked her she took a dump and plastered on the side of her doot, read as clear as ya please "Snickers". Seriously.
    Tootsie Rolls?

  16. #156
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    What did Mr. Spock find in the toilet?

    The captain's log.

  17. #157
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    Why did Captain Kirk pee on the ceiling?

    He wanted to go where no man had gone before.

  18. #158
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    I read the other day they raised another 2 Million Dollars for the Ronald McDonald house.

    Just how big of a house does this F***ing Clown need, anyway?





    (RIP, Drake Sather)


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  19. #159
    my all time favorite jackie martling gem:

    what the toughest part about having sex with your own sister?

    pulling her little diapers to the side

  20. #160
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    A bloke was standing at a bar, and a beautiful woman was beside him, so he leans over and says,

    "You remind me of my little toe."

    She replies, "What? You Mean I'm small and cute?"

    He says, "No. I’ll probably bang you on the coffee table later when I'm drunk."

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