• Amalia Granata, October, on ending her relationship with River Plate's Cristian Fabbiani. "At times it was annoying. His wife was so insecure."
• Larissa Riquelme, November, claiming official Paraguay team model status and doing a 3D photo-shoot: "Football has changed my life. I like being famous!"
• Plus Dallys Ferreira, April, on why footballers are a letdown. "I like to be dominated, but frankly, footballers are ninnies. They disappoint a girl like me."
24 Feb: Laryea Kingston pledges to improve his behaviour at Hearts after being fined for a "team bus bust-up": "The manager is like a father to me. I will not let him down again. But it is not about words, it is about what I deliver on the pitch."
27 Feb: Kicks opponent in testicles after seven minutes of his next match. Sent off.
Best FO slanging matches:
• Montpellier president Louis Nicollin on critics who said his team were joint top because it's a weak league. "I piss in their arse cracks. That's a good answer, don't you think? It's all scandalous talk."
• Plus: Timisoara's Marian Iancu – suspended by Romania's FA for baiting Universitatea Craiova coach Victor Piturca on live TV as a "homosexual satanist" after Piturca said Iancu was "bloated and stuffed with ****". Iancu: "The FA should be ashamed of themselves. It's a total lack of respect."
Best President of a football team:
Aug: Gigi Becali says new Steaua Bucharest coach Ilie Dumitrescu – his 12th in seven years after previous coaches were sacked for reasons including "being too Muslim" – is "wonderful ... He is doing this unpaid." Dumitrescu: "Money does not interest me. I just want respect."
Best speech by a coach:
24 Sep: John Hughes, Hibs manager: "I've asked my players to show character – and I'll lead the fight. Bring it on. I love proving people wrong, I love a siege mentality, looking into the eye of the tiger. You need to stand up to adversity. Resign? Jesus Christ, we're only six games in – behave yourselves." 4 Oct: Resigns.
Best votes of confidence:
• 30 Sep: Milan Mandaric, Leicester: "We can't turn things upside down now, for goodness sake. Now is the time to show how united we are behind Paulo Sousa, not to listen to media speculation. It is as simple as that." 1 Oct: Sacks him.
• 26 Jan: Darragh MacAnthony on Peterborough manager Mark Cooper: "Nobody has given the bloke a chance. He has had to deal with one fiasco after another and deserves support. I'm not ready to throw the towel in." 1 Feb: throws towel in.
• Plus: one to watch – November: Karren Brady on Avram Grant: "Only weak-minded people press the panic button ... I can assure you there is no finger on the button."
11 August: Sotirios Kyrgiakos: "I am a player for AEK for the next four years: I'm not some type of tradeable product. I have shown to everybody that I honour my contracts."
20 August: Joins Liverpool.
Most underpaid manager:
£22,000: Sven Erickson's daily income as coach of Ivory Coast (23% of the population earning under 80p a day). "I don't think I am paid that well," said Sven. "But I'm happy."
Best League Official:
• November: Croatia FA head Vlatko Markovic denies election fraud and says critics of his pledge never to allow a gay player to play for Croatia should back off. "You want to know how I feel about that? Write this down: I'm ****ing sick of you reporters. Write it down."
December: Markovic re-elected for a fourth term.
• Plus: Indonesia FA head Nurdin Halid – jailed in 2008 for misappropriating an $18m cooking oil distribution fund, but now back in the job. Last week's highlight: paying a $250k bonus to players using cash from a cardboard box. "They deserved it!"
Man of the Year:
Sepp Blatter "My secret? People believe in me: they have seen how much I have done for football since 1975. Heads of state court me. You know, football has become a monster – but it's a positive monster!"
Best Sepp moment: 2009 - South Africa's president, Jacob Zuma, denies 16 counts of corruption, bribery, fraud and racketeering; all charges dropped.
2010 - Zuma praises Sepp as a "true inspiration".
Model Larissa Riquelme on her plans for 2011: "Last year I became loved worldwide through football, but mostly because of my own hard work. This year I will add more silicon! My breasts are my friends: they accompany me wherever I go."