View Poll Results: What should I wear or bring to the party?

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  • A tobacco pipe

    2 22.22%
  • A cane

    1 11.11%
  • A cape

    6 66.67%
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Thread: What item of interest/sophistication can I wear/bring to a party?

  1. #1
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    What item of interest/sophistication can I wear/bring to a party?

    Long story, short - Going to a party next Saturday. Need something of interest to accessorize with and create an aura of sophistication. I've decided against a fake mustache and not really into a top hat. I also won't be arriving at the party in a white vehicle of any kind. Please vote above and, if possible, provide evidence that said item will result in intrigue and inquiry as I enter the room.

    So what should I wear or have with me as I enter the party and say, "Please allow myself to introduce......myself...."?

    Write in votes accepted.

  2. #2
    [QUOTE=jetstream23;4067913]Long story, short - Going to a party next Saturday. Need something of interest to accessorize with and create an aura of sophistication. I've decided against a fake mustache and not really into a top hat. I also won't be arriving at the party in a white vehicle. Please vote above and, if possible, provide evidence that said item will result in intrigue and inquiry as I enter the room.

    So what should I wear or have with me as I enter the party and say, "Please allow myself to introduce......myself...."?

    Write in votes accepted.[/QUOTE]

    a midget maybe? People love midgets.

  3. #3
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    Wear a condom, it's always well received, shows you are serious.

  4. #4
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    FYI - I've also scratched a monocle and a red robe off the list (for obvious reasons)

  5. #5
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    [QUOTE=gunnails;4067918]Wear a condom, it's always well received, shows you are serious.[/QUOTE]


    Shows that I'm a man of expectations....but also concerned for others. I like it. Wife probably won't though.

    Okay, condom is on the practice squad. Probably won't make the active roster of options though.

  6. #6
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    -
























    [IMG]http://www.nightmarefactory.com/MR156004.jpg[/IMG]



    -

  7. #7
    How about carrying in a Motorola Xoom, it has none of the shortcomings of the Apple, you can multitask like crazy, the screen is true 16 x 10 HD, you can expand the memory with the micro-SD card, etc, etc. Best of all, no crappy iTunes to deal with. Just usb to yout computer and transfer music, movies, photos etc with an easy drag and drop. HD games are beautiful as it runs with a dual core processor and has 1 Gb of Ram, unlike Apple's puny 256K of Ram on their non-HD 4:3 screen. You'll love some of the widgets which allow you to scroll through your emails, top news stories, You Tube Vids, books, etc on your home screen without having to open an application. You can customize your home screen to suit your usage, unlike the iPad which has only icons that can be moved around. The whole interface and user experience is very intuitive after playing with it for half a day.

    Plenty of apps and the list is growing daily. No where near the number Apple has but I've yet to look for one i want and come up empty. So far, the best one allows me to access my desktop remotely and stream all my media in near HD to my tablet. I can also watch my recorded TV shows and watch live TV in near HD. Awesome. Going to be very awesome when I want to watch the game when I'm somewhere there's no TV available.

    Oh, and it has flash, so I get a full web experience on about 3 million websites that don't use html5.

    Wifi versions of the 32 Gb Xoom or 16 Gb Samsung Galaxy is only $400 after coupon. Get the ACER, ASUS or Dell 7" Streak for $300 with same coupon. It expires on July 30.

  8. #8
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    [QUOTE=FF2®;4067930]How about carrying in a Motorola Xoom, it has none of the shortcomings of the Apple, you can multitask like crazy, the screen is true 16 x 10 HD, you can expand the memory with the micro-SD card, etc, etc. Best of all, no crappy iTunes to deal with. Just usb to yout computer and transfer music, movies, photos etc with an easy drag and drop. HD games are beautiful as it runs with a dual core processor and has 1 Gb of Ram, unlike Apple's puny 256K of Ram on their non-HD 4:3 screen. You'll love some of the widgets which allow you to scroll through your emails, top news stories, You Tube Vids, books, etc on your home screen without having to open an application. You can customize your home screen to suit your usage, unlike the iPad which has only icons that can be moved around. The whole interface and user experience is very intuitive after playing with it for half a day.

    Plenty of apps and the list is growing daily. No where near the number Apple has but I've yet to look for one i want and come up empty. So far, the best one allows me to access my desktop remotely and stream all my media in near HD to my tablet. I can also watch my recorded TV shows and watch live TV in near HD. Awesome. Going to be very awesome when I want to watch the game when I'm somewhere there's no TV available.

    Oh, and it has flash, so I get a full web experience on about 3 million websites that don't use html5.

    Wifi versions of the 32 Gb Xoom or 16 Gb Samsung Galaxy is only $400 after coupon. Get the ACER, ASUS or Dell 7" Streak for $300 with same coupon. It expires on July 30.[/QUOTE]


    King of comedy!

  9. #9
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    "She'll take this seriously."

    [IMG]http://atrocitynights.com/JnB/Images/Animal%20House.jpg[/IMG]

    I think the photo alone provides all evidence needed that said item will result in intrigue and inquiry as you enter the room.

  10. #10
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    Wear bright red lipstick. That ought to make you the most talked about
    person at the gala. Your wife probably could lend you hers. (Also carry
    a man purse). Earrings might be a bit much though if they are oh, so,
    overstated. Go easy on the jewlery.

  11. #11
    I vote anal beads around your neck...

    It will be hilarious for you to walk in a sex shop and buy them.

    People will mistake them for some type of African based adornment.

    It's just win/win.

  12. #12
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    carry a pineapple with you all evening.

    refuse to tell anyone why.

    you'll be the talk of the party.

  13. #13
    Highest Negative Rep
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    iPad 2 3G

    iPhone 4

    Rolex Submariner Date

    Rolex Turnograph Date (right wrist)

    BMW Remote Access Keyfob

    1960 Leica Film Camera

    JFK to London Boarding Pass

    Your trophy wife's 2010 W2

    Your 7th Graders SAT Scores

    SAR I

  14. #14
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    Wear a fez, a dickie, a belt AND suspenders, shorts, and Birkenstocks with white socks.

  15. #15
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    [QUOTE=SAR I;4067977]iPad 2 3G

    iPhone 4

    Rolex Submariner Date

    Rolex Turnograph Date (right wrist)

    BMW Remote Access Keyfob

    1960 Leica Film Camera

    JFK to London Boarding Pass

    Your trophy wife's 2010 W2

    Your 7th Graders SAT Scores

    SAR I[/QUOTE]

    Kenmore refrigerator with manual defrost

  16. #16
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    ipad 2

  17. #17
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    beret

    cape

    one of Welkhead's giant marionettes

  18. #18
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    [QUOTE=Timmy®;4067990]one of Welkhead's giant marionettes[/QUOTE]

    lmao....I forgot about those...


    :D

  19. #19
    [QUOTE=32green;4068007]lmao....I forgot about those...


    :D[/QUOTE]

    I've tried to.

  20. #20
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    codpiece worn on the outside
    a cane
    a bowler

    pull up in a white car and ask where the milk bar is

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