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Thread: I had a dream; analysis please

  1. #1
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    I had a dream; analysis please

    So last night I'm sleeping off a nice MNF binge and the dreams are coming fast and furious. One actually woke me up from laughing. I was painting a room in this customer's house (Charlie Samuels, the ex-Mets equipment manager who got caught for stealing memorabilia -- I actually did paint his house around 25 years ago), and the sexy wife asks me if I can help her hook up her "dual VCR." I say "no problem," and I go to take a look, and her "dual VCR" is actually a 2-slice toaster. I laughed my ass off so hard at this dumb broad that it actually woke me up. Then I got pissed and tried to fall back to sleep real fast so I could get to the part where we start banging, but I couldn't get the dream theme back on track. Dammit.

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    What does a toaster do? Makes soft bread hard. What else comes to mind when a chick says "dual inputs"? Exactly.

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    [QUOTE=Borgoguy;4162602]What does a toaster do? Makes soft bread hard. What else comes to mind when a chick says "dual inputs"? Exactly.[/QUOTE]

    Geebus.

    You ARE the Godfather. :worship:

    _

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    [QUOTE=shakin318;4162593]So last night I'm sleeping off a nice MNF binge and the dreams are coming fast and furious. One actually woke me up from laughing. I was painting a room in this customer's house (Charlie Samuels, the ex-Mets equipment manager who got caught for stealing memorabilia -- I actually did paint his house around 25 years ago), and the sexy wife asks me if I can help her hook up her "dual VCR." I say "no problem," and I go to take a look, and her "dual VCR" is actually a 2-slice toaster. I laughed my ass off so hard at this dumb broad that it actually woke me up. Then I got pissed and tried to fall back to sleep real fast so I could get to the part where we start banging, but I couldn't get the dream theme back on track. Dammit.[/QUOTE]

    You're gay and have an unnatural fear of technology and women.

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    banging walls > banging toasters


    My expert analysis is that you may have adequecy issues in that a wall would require much more effort, strength, and size, than a toaster. It's all fish's fault.

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    [QUOTE=shakin318;4162593]So last night I'm sleeping off a nice MNF binge and the dreams are coming fast and furious. One actually woke me up from laughing. I was painting a room in this customer's house (Charlie Samuels, the ex-Mets equipment manager who got caught for stealing memorabilia -- I actually did paint his house around 25 years ago), and the sexy wife asks me if I can help her hook up her "dual VCR." I say "no problem," and I go to take a look, and her "dual VCR" is actually a 2-slice toaster. I laughed my ass off so hard at this dumb broad that it actually woke me up. Then I got pissed and tried to fall back to sleep real fast so I could get to the part where we start banging, but I couldn't get the dream theme back on track. Dammit.[/QUOTE]

    Allow me to ruin the ending of your dream. You never bang the chick.

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    So I had a dream last night. There was this guy painting my house. I asked him if he could help hook up my dual VCR. Instead of going into the living room where we have all our electronic equipment, he goes into the kitchen. He picks up the toaster and tries to put the VHS tapes into the toaster slots. I started laughing so hard that I woke myself up. I tried to get back to sleep to see what else the guy was going to do with the toaster but I couldn't get the dream back. Darnit.















    :D

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    [QUOTE=quantum;4162637]You're gay and have an unnatural fear of technology and women.[/QUOTE]

    You will now think of me every time your waitress brings you pre-buttered toast at the diner. There.

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    this thread is useless without pics.....

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    This is probably the best thread i have read on this site in a long time...

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    [QUOTE=Borgoguy;4162602]What does a toaster do? Makes soft bread hard. What else comes to mind when a chick says "dual inputs"? Exactly.[/QUOTE]

    [QUOTE=quantum;4162637]You're gay and have an unnatural fear of technology and women.[/QUOTE]

    :rofl:

    [QUOTE=Lone Star Lady;4162676]So I had a dream last night. There was this guy painting my house. I asked him if he could help hook up my dual VCR. Instead of going into the living room where we have all our electronic equipment, he goes into the kitchen. He picks up the toaster and tries to put the VHS tapes into the toaster slots. I started laughing so hard that I woke myself up. I tried to get back to sleep to see what else the guy was going to do with the toaster but I couldn't get the dream back. Darnit.















    :D[/QUOTE]

    Wonderfully played!!

    :clapper:

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    [QUOTE=Polidore22;4162644]Allow me to ruin the ending of your dream. You bang the toaster.[/QUOTE]

    fixed

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    [QUOTE=pauliec;4162777]fixed[/QUOTE]

    lolz. At least he got some action.

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    "equipment manager"???

    How Freudian!

    [IMG]http://www.myviagrarx.com/wp-content/uploads/2011/01/generic-viagra.jpg[/IMG]

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    [QUOTE=Polidore22;4162644]Allow me to ruin the ending of your dream. You bang the toaster..[/QUOTE]

    [QUOTE=pauliec;4162777]fixed[/QUOTE]

    [url]http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=toaster%20sex[/url]

    [B]toaster sex[/B]

    To have anal - when a male inserts his penis into the arsehole of a fellow creature , may be a male or female or even a dog!
    The toaster is the anus.

    There are various jokes accompanied with this euphanism.
    " The longer you leave it in, the browner it gets! "
    " Wow those guys are having toaster sex! "
    Last edited by crossfire; 09-27-2011 at 01:36 PM.

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    ps When I woke up this morning, my dog had chewed his way out of the house through my French Doors, and hasn't returned since. Should I put up some posters?

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    [QUOTE=shakin318;4162832]ps When I woke up this morning, my dog had chewed his way out of the house through my French Doors, and hasn't returned since. Should I put up some posters?[/QUOTE]

    No, just hang around down at the pound, looking for a pickup, Mr. Goodmilkbone. :rolleyes:

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    Greatest. Thread. Title. Eva.

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    [QUOTE=WestCoastOffensive;4162870]Greatest. Thread. Title. Eva.[/QUOTE]

    What I did there. You see it.

  20. #20
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    [QUOTE=shakin318;4162884]What I did there. You see it.[/QUOTE]
    It was ethereal; No toasty videotapes or Powerpoints to muck up the clarity.

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