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Thread: Squirrels And Chipmunks: Can I Kill Them?

  1. #41
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    [QUOTE=GMCJETS;4180179]So those of us who shower daily and dont stink like skanky swamp azz,sweat,cigarette smoke and booze are worthy of an opinion here?[/QUOTE]

    Yes. Tailgaters are tolerated, not embraced.

    SAR I

  2. #42
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    Only if you don't belie e in the power of friendship.

  3. #43
    [QUOTE=gunnails;4180081]===========================================

    How many squirrels do you typically carry with you?[/QUOTE]

    "Typically", I carry none.

  4. #44
    [QUOTE=SAR I;4180199]Yes. Tailgaters are tolerated, not embraced.

    SAR I[/QUOTE]

    [IMG]http://www.giantballoonrental.com/images/charctrz/z6.jpg[/IMG]

  5. #45
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    [QUOTE=SAR I;4179906]Was going to ask that next.

    I want to kill as many as possible as quickly as possible. About six squirrels and maybe a dozen chipmunks. If it kills the rabbits too, it's collateral damage I'm willing to accept.

    SAR I[/QUOTE]

    For a tried and true old fashion method of chipmunk eradication try this:

    Fill a 5 gallon bucket up 1/3rd with water. Pour in just enough sunflower seeds until water surface is covered with the floating seeds. Take a small plank and put across top of bucket- sprinkle sunflower seeds on plank and around bucket.

    Alvin and his friends will eat the seeds on the board, look down and think the bucket is full of seeds. When they jump into the bucket their raisin brains will realize that it was a trap before drowning.

  6. #46
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    [QUOTE=PatriotReign;4180218]For a tried and true old fashion method of chipmunk eradication try this:

    Fill a 5 gallon bucket up 1/3rd with water. Pour in just enough sunflower seeds until water surface is covered with the floating seeds. Take a small plank and put across top of bucket- sprinkle sunflower seeds on plank and around bucket.

    Alvin and his friends will eat the seeds on the board, look down and think the bucket is full of seeds. When they jump into the bucket their raisin brains will realize that it was a trap before drowning.[/QUOTE]

    Excellent.

    What I like about this plan is that a) it's inexpensive, b) it addresses the ease-of-disposal issue, and c) it gives me a nice modicum of vengeance with it's "gotcha" moment.

    Thanks so much.

    SAR I

  7. #47
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    [QUOTE=escamoter2;4180207]"Typically", I carry none.[/QUOTE]

    Listen, if you love the animals so much there is a solution here.

    The squirrels and chipmunks aren't ruining my life or threatening my family. They're merely annoying. And annoyance has a price.

    To spare the lives of the six squirrels and dozen chipmunks, I'll take $1000 via PayPal. You have 24 hours to come up with the money and save the little rodents.

    Pay and save them. Don't pay and they die. It's on you now.

    SAR I

  8. #48
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    [QUOTE=CHIROJET-WPB;4180110]Oh....and [U]if[/U] by posting this stupid thread you were looking for approval to shoot them...you're an A$$hole.[/QUOTE]

    [QUOTE=CHIROJET-WPB;4180113]Dick!![/QUOTE]

    [QUOTE=CHIROJET-WPB;4180119]Double Dick!![/QUOTE]

    I realize this is a controversial subject and may be construed as offensive to some. With that in mind, please refrain from name-calling and such.

    Thankee.

    [QUOTE=PatriotReign;4180218] When they jump into the bucket their raisin brains will realize that it was a trap before drowning.[/QUOTE]

    Talk about a gratuitous sentence.

    :D
    Last edited by 32green; 10-09-2011 at 08:39 AM.

  9. #49
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    Best thread in weeks:yes:

  10. #50
    [QUOTE=SAR I;4180227]Listen, if you love the animals so much there is a solution here.

    The squirrels and chipmunks aren't ruining my life or threatening my family. They're merely annoying. And annoyance has a price.

    To spare the lives of the six squirrels and dozen chipmunks, I'll take $1000 via PayPal. You have 24 hours to come up with the money and save the little rodents.

    Pay and save them. Don't pay and they die. It's on you now.

    SAR I[/QUOTE]

    So your a hired hitman preying on poor unarmed defenseless animals. How fitting.

  11. #51
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    [QUOTE=GMCJETS;4180373]So your a hired hitman preying on poor unarmed defenseless animals. How fitting.[/QUOTE]

    Sort of.

    I'm a disgruntled Bergen County homeowner whose annoyance has a price. It's more like a hostage-taking situation than a contract-killer situation.

    SAR I

  12. #52
    [QUOTE=SAR I;4180379]Sort of.

    I'm a disgruntled Bergen County homeowner whose annoyance has a price. It's more like a hostage-taking situation than a contract-killer situation.

    SAR I[/QUOTE]

    Nice.
    Last edited by GMCJETS; 10-09-2011 at 10:11 AM.

  13. #53
    Clearly what you're looking for is a red tailed hawk or maybe a falcon.

    Actually we had a serious problem awhile back with being over run by chipmunks. A pair of hawks arrived and the rodents were finished in 2 weeks.

  14. #54
    [QUOTE=frostlich;4180386]Clearly what you're looking for is a red tailed hawk or maybe a falcon.

    Actually we had a serious problem awhile back with being over run by chipmunks. A pair of hawks arrived and the rodents were finished in 2 weeks.[/QUOTE]

    Isnt he going to have to switch to State Farm Insurance to be able to afford that.

  15. #55
    [QUOTE=SAR I;4180117]Look, I killed a dog once and I didn't feel guilty or need approval for that so poisoning a couple dozen rodents doesn't hit my conscience in the slightest.

    SAR I[/QUOTE]

    [B][U]Psychosis:[/U][/B] A severe mental disorder, sometimes with physical damage to the brain, marked by a deranged personality and a distorted view of reality.

    *this is not directed towards any individual in a demeaning way. Just posted here randomly.

  16. #56
    I think I hear some pigeons on my air conditioner (can't afford central air like the beautiful people can). Think I need to break out my slingshot. It is a Friedrich air conditioner you know. :cool:

  17. #57
    [QUOTE=LIDeadHead;4180446]I think I hear some pigeons on my air conditioner (can't afford central air like the beautiful people can). Think I need to break out my slingshot. It is a Friedrich air conditioner you know. :cool:[/QUOTE]

    Pigeons, theres your tailgate appetizer or main course delivered to your window.

  18. #58
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    [QUOTE=SAR I;4180227]Listen, if you love the animals so much there is a solution here.

    The squirrels and chipmunks aren't ruining my life or threatening my family. They're merely annoying. And annoyance has a price.

    To spare the lives of the six squirrels and dozen chipmunks, I'll take $1000 via PayPal. You have 24 hours to come up with the money and save the little rodents.

    Pay and save them. Don't pay and they die. It's on you now.

    SAR I[/QUOTE]

    1) What do you plan on using the money for? It matters, especially if you plan to roll it into killing #7 & #13.:yes:

    2) Couldn't he just send you a picture of his erect penis instead? :dunno:

  19. #59
    [QUOTE=SAR I;4180138]That's why wealthy people [I]shower[/I].

    SAR I[/QUOTE]

    [B][U]Megalomania:[/U][/B] A psychopathological condition characterized by delusional fantasies of wealth, power, or omnipotence.

  20. #60
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    Unreal

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