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Thread: Die ***** Die

  1. #21
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    [QUOTE=Big L;4460324]You live near the woods? If so, cats prolly gone. Some other higher on the food chains dinner.[/QUOTE]

    No but there are definitely coyotes. And traffic of course. There are foxes too but I kinda doubt a fox can take a housecat.

  2. #22
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    Nice try Bushy.

    [IMG]http://i2.photobucket.com/albums/y13/buzzsaw51/1334502871485-1.gif[/IMG]

  3. #23
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    Price of tuna is through the roof, just saying.

  4. #24
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    [QUOTE=BushyTheBeaver;4460322]LOL. Someone's been paying attention. OK, for that alone, I'll call temporarily call off the hit.

    But it doesn't solve the basic problem. I hate this bleeping cat. Plus it treats the other cats like ****.[/QUOTE]


    If you're going to make the effort to share your creepy late night proclivities with your fellow Hampur brothers in creep,who am I to not pay attention? :P

    Semper Hampus Erectus!

  5. #25
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    Cat make it back yet?

  6. #26
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    [QUOTE=BushyTheBeaver;4460283]I'm a cat guy. Say that up front. Always have been. Grew up with them. Like having them around. I like their independent spirit. They're not needy like dogs. Well, most of them aren't.

    But just like they're not overly sentimental about me, I'm not overly sentimental about them. Cats die. They get disease. They get hit by cars. They get eaten by rats. I accept that. A cat dies, I feel sad, then I move on, get another cat.

    Most cats are generally OK. Some are especially nice. Some are distant. Some are dicks. Like people, they run the gamut. Sometimes you take in a cat who turns out to be a total dick. This sucks, because cats live a long time. Unlike goldfish you can't slip them into your mom's Thanksgiving stuffing...unless you're a cretin, you're stuck with this dick for fifteen years or so. It's actually easier to ditch a bad girlfriend than it is to ditch a bad cat.

    So that's the prequel to today's dilema...

    Three years ago we got a new cat. My son picked it out. I was not there. Possibly had I been I would have recognized the signs of dickdom in this cat and nixed the deal. But as I say I was not there. My wife was. She knows **** about cats. She grew up a Jewish girl in northeast Philly. The closest she ever came to having a pet was the girls with bunny ears in daddy's bathroom reading magazines.

    Anyway, last night I let our dick cat out. Apparently it has not been spotted since. My wife sent me (no lie) 19 emails today expressing her concern over this cat who's been out of sight under 24 hours.

    Now if you know cats you know a 24 hour disappearance is no big deal. Maybe someone else is feeding it. Maybe it got the crap kicked out of it in a fight and is laying low.

    But my (highly controlling) wife does not know this. Thus she is convinced it's dead.

    Which opens an interesting question. Because I hate this cat. It's a fugging dick.

    If it shows up, but nobody sees it but me, how bad would it be if it suffered some sort of "accident." :confused:[/QUOTE]


    We're cat people too, we've always had at least two at any given time.
    The last cat we adopted a couple years ago is a dick cat.

    If the litter box isn't clean enough to our liking, he poops in the tub.

    What a dick.




    [IMG]http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-M9YvwKomcNs/T3V7PPFjs8I/AAAAAAAACBY/O8czvJbi9Sg/s1600/truestory.jpg[/IMG]

  7. #27
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    Our cat is pushing 25 years. I'm pretty sure it died 10 years ago when it was scalped by a coyote or something, but it just hasn't tipped over yet.

    It mostly makes it to the litter box, but sometimes ****s in a 'close enough' attempt due to her arthritis. Or she's just walking along and 'something' just falls out. Do they make diapers for cats?

    The mocking birds swoop down and peck her when she lays by the front porch on the sidewalk. She's too slow anymore to do anything about it. She normally just lays there all pissed off and meows at them. She did get one last year though and left it on the front doorstep. Dunno what got into her.

    Oh, the dementia is kicking in...she howls at 3AM because she forgets where she is until somebody comes and finds and pets her.

    So...that's something you can look forward to.

  8. #28
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    "I'm a cat guy."

    You lost all cred with your 1st 4 words.

    You may just as well have said "I'm a gay pats fan who doesn't like short people, black cops, people that live in the country, who uses pasta sauce out of a jar and drinks no name beer."

  9. #29
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    Cat's back. Some of you guys don't know ****.

  10. #30
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    [QUOTE=Beerfish;4460434]"I'm a cat guy."

    You lost all cred with your 1st 4 words.

    You may just as well have said "I'm a gay pats fan who doesn't like short people, black cops, people that live in the country, who use pasta sauce out of a jar and drink no name beer."[/QUOTE]

    Pasta sauce? You mean gravy?
    Last edited by BushyTheBeaver; 05-05-2012 at 10:05 AM.

  11. #31
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    [QUOTE=BushyTheBeaver;4460447]Pasta sauce? You mean gravy?[/QUOTE]

    Northeast Philly, Hasidic? Big pocket up there.

  12. #32
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    [QUOTE=Carlton;4460320]Have SouthSide over for weekly dinners and that ***** will never come back.[/QUOTE]

    lmao

  13. #33
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    [QUOTE=32green;4460305]Never stopped you before.:confused:

    Is this a new stratergy you unearthed in Scotland?
    [/QUOTE]

    Aye, mellow highland zen, obtained by staring into the vast beautiful brilliance of the highlands. It changes a man.

    [QUOTE=FF2;4460309]and yet you did. In sort of a dickish way.

    welcome back[/QUOTE]

    [IMG]http://i50.tinypic.com/2jfbspc.gif[/IMG]

  14. #34
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    [IMG]https://lh3.googleusercontent.com/--rW3Pjxv8tc/T6G6z3LOjMI/AAAAAAAASaU/vsuy0J7bjOQ/w497-h373/cat_leap_gif.gif[/IMG]

    [IMG]http://30.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_m3jecu9kn61r0rc6ho1_500.gif[/IMG]

    [IMG]http://27.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_m2mp4aiRta1qa5rnho1_250.gif[/IMG]

  15. #35
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    [IMG]http://i50.tinypic.com/2jfbspc.gif[/IMG][/QUOTE]


    You fount Nessie? :eek:

  16. #36
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    [QUOTE=BushyTheBeaver;4460326]No but there are definitely coyotes. And traffic of course. There are foxes too but I kinda doubt a fox can take a housecat.[/QUOTE]

    Easily. No contest between a cat and a fox. Fox wins every time.

  17. #37
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    [QUOTE=Fishooked;4460395]We're cat people too, we've always had at least two at any given time.
    The last cat we adopted a couple years ago is a dick cat.

    [b]If the litter box isn't clean enough to our liking, he poops in the tub.[/b]

    What a dick.




    [IMG]http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-M9YvwKomcNs/T3V7PPFjs8I/AAAAAAAACBY/O8czvJbi9Sg/s1600/truestory.jpg[/IMG][/QUOTE]

    LMAO! True story. I know from experience with my two cats.

  18. #38
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    [QUOTE=BushyTheBeaver;4460447]Pasta sauce? You mean gravy?[/QUOTE]

    Touche.

  19. #39
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    Why hasn't SAR complained about 32 yet?

    _

  20. #40
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    [QUOTE=BushyTheBeaver;4460445]Cat's back. Some of you guys don't know ****.[/QUOTE]

    Glad you found your dick.

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