[QUOTE=frostlich;4460427]Our cat is pushing 25 years. I'm pretty sure it died 10 years ago when it was scalped by a coyote or something, but it just hasn't tipped over yet.
It mostly makes it to the litter box, but sometimes ****s in a 'close enough' attempt due to her arthritis. Or she's just walking along and 'something' just falls out. Do they make diapers for cats?
The mocking birds swoop down and peck her when she lays by the front porch on the sidewalk. She's too slow anymore to do anything about it. She normally just lays there all pissed off and meows at them. She did get one last year though and left it on the front doorstep. Dunno what got into her.
Oh, the dementia is kicking in...she howls at 3AM because she forgets where she is until somebody comes and finds and pets her.
So...that's something you can look forward to.[/QUOTE]
Almost missed this gem on re-reading this thread now on its last legs. "The mocking birds swoop down and peck her." That is pure poetry, compared to which Anne Sexton was a no-talent junkie *****.
I just saw your little league ethics thread. I believe you have a "cat" named Erik, and I have solved your problem. This thread was a great ruse, I admire your dedication. Your PM was not necessary, I am flattered, but of course I cannot accept. I do believe your "honor kidnapping" defense will holdup in court, jury makeup being the wildcard,of course.