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Thread: Training Camp Coverage:

  1. #1
    All Pro
    Join Date
    Apr 2003
    Manhattan, NY

    Training Camp Coverage - Parody

    This is pretty funny stuff. This seems to be a new sports blog in the grantland style. There's more than what I quoted here. But the "saga" of the unnamed rookie made me laugh, all I can think of is Brett Ratliff

    Day 1: Players report to camp. The obligatory local news footage shows the players parking their Escalades and marching one by one to the dormitories lugging a month’s worth of provisions. It’s like “The Things They Carried,” but with less inspiration and heroism and more video game consoles.
    - For what's it's worth. The Things They Carried is a great collection of short stories. I highly recommend it.

    Day 6: Undrafted rookie cornerback from tiny college intercepts a pass during seven-on-seven drill, begins trending on Twitter.

    Day 8: Undrafted rookie cornerback intercepts two more passes during seven-on-seven drills. His story appears on the front of the sports page, just above the back-to-back no-hitters.
    Day 14: Undrafted rookie cornerback is mentioned 43 times during the telecast, records one tackle.
    Day 15: If the first-team offense played poorly, today is spent panicking and demanding massive changes. If the first-team offense played well, today is spent criticizing the head coach for exposing the starters to injury and showing too much of the playbook. If the first-team offense played somewhere in between, today is spent complaining about how boring and meaningless preseason games are.
    Day 18: Undrafted rookie cornerback breaks up three passes during seven-on-seven drills. Twitter explodes. Coach rewards him with a promotion to the third-team defense.
    Day 23: First round of cuts. Undrafted rookie cornerback is released and never mentioned again.
    Last edited by Batmans A Scientist; 08-14-2012 at 04:02 PM. Reason: Not actual information


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