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Thread: Dollar Shave Club: Too good to be true? No!

  1. #61
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    Quote Originally Posted by 32green View Post
    The reason I ended up with Achmed, was because the two boistrous older Italian guys in their late 60's who I used to go to, lost their shop to their bookie.

    Previously when I was in there, invariably at some point, some middle aged chooch with a newspaper would come in and both Mario and Angelo would stop what they were doing, go over to this guy and place bets a/o order lottery tix (full service bookie).
    He'd insult them in Italian, they'd laugh... and he'd leave.

    Then, Mario would go back to cutting my hair and watching the Jerry SPringer show over my head whispering "looka da teetsa, oh da teetsa" as he ogled some milf's boobz bouncing around the stage on the TV.

    For some reason,This was actually all very charming to me.

    Anyhoo, after years of this, I come in one day and the shop is stone quiet. TV off, no one waiting for a haircut...and the bookie is sitting at the cash register reading the racing form.

    I sit down for my haircut and Mario says nothing the whole time. He finishes and when I go to pay him, he tells me "paya heema" mumbling under his breath... gesturing towards the bookie at the register.

    DIng! I realize these two dopes were in deep with this guy, who was ensuring prompt payment by manning the register.

    Next time I went back, there were two zipperhead guido's with tweezed eyebrows in their 20's cutting hair... and rap music was blasting. Mario and Angelo's family photos were gone.

    -

    -
    you're lucky Angelo didn't pawn your toupee' to cover a daily double gone wrong

  2. #62
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    Quote Originally Posted by Timmy® View Post
    you're lucky Angelo didn't pawn your toupee' to cover a daily double gone wrong
    Lmao....."what eesa.... dis ateeng? a seestum or a racoona?"




    -

  3. #63
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    Quote Originally Posted by shakin318 View Post
    Don't worry. That 30-year-old blue sh:t in the 100 year-old never-washed fluted glass jar is a great sterilizer.
    the official blue barber water - 10 ten dollars a gallon

    blue toilet water for port-o-potties - 70 cents a gallon

    hmm?


  4. #64
    Quote Originally Posted by 32green View Post
    Lmao....."what eesa.... dis ateeng? a seestum or a racoona?"




    -
    "Ita woood poo-cee".

  5. #65
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    Quote Originally Posted by 32green View Post
    Lmao....."what eesa.... dis ateeng? a seestum or a racoona?"




    -
    he could cut your hair while you are at the gym not working out

  6. #66
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    Quote Originally Posted by Borgoguy View Post
    "Ita woood poo-cee".


    Quote Originally Posted by Timmy® View Post
    he could cut your hair while you are at the gym not working out
    Lol..."wtf'a theesa hair never seema to grow. Oh well, I fake it and charge him."

  7. #67
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    Again...here is the link if anyone wants to give it a try:


    http://www.dollarshaveclub.com/

  8. #68
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    Quote Originally Posted by 32green View Post
    The reason I ended up with Achmed, was because the two boistrous older Italian guys in their late 60's who I used to go to, lost their shop to their bookie.

    Previously when I was in there, invariably at some point, some middle aged chooch with a newspaper would come in and both Mario and Angelo would stop what they were doing, go over to this guy and place bets a/o order lottery tix (full service bookie).
    He'd insult them in Italian, they'd laugh... and he'd leave.

    Then, Mario would go back to cutting my hair and watching the Jerry SPringer show over my head whispering "looka da teetsa, oh da teetsa" as he ogled some milf's boobz bouncing around the stage on the TV.

    For some reason,This was actually all very charming to me.

    Anyhoo, after years of this, I come in one day and the shop is stone quiet. TV off, no one waiting for a haircut...and the bookie is sitting at the cash register reading the racing form.

    I sit down for my haircut and Mario says nothing the whole time. He finishes and when I go to pay him, he tells me "paya heema" mumbling under his breath... gesturing towards the bookie at the register.

    DIng! I realize these two dopes were in deep with this guy, who was ensuring prompt payment by manning the register.

    Next time I went back, there were two zipperhead guido's with tweezed eyebrows in their 20's cutting hair... and rap music was blasting. Mario and Angelo's family photos were gone.

    -

    -

    The racism against Italians and the overall feeling that it's okay in this country makes me sick. It's gone on,too long. **** Roots, Im starting a screenplay." Eggplants parmigiana"

  9. #69
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    Quote Originally Posted by thebigragu View Post
    The racism against Italians and the overall feeling that it's okay in this country makes me sick. It's gone on,too long. **** Roots, Im starting a screenplay." Eggplants parmigiana"


    Nothing was more brutal than the ethnic slurs between Irish and Italian friends when I was growing up. I still have friends who cant text me about the most mundane thing without using terms like mick, donkey, bogman, bog-chimp, harp etc.

    THese are middle-aged professional men.

    -

  10. #70
    Quote Originally Posted by Borgoguy View Post
    I thought he had PGAD (Persistent Genital Arousal Disorder/male version).
    Actually, you're thinking of Dirtstar and it's IGAD (Involuntary so on and so forth). Caltron just has a screaming mad bubble factory known as herpes to go along with his HIV and Hep A/B/C.

  11. #71
    Quote Originally Posted by southside View Post
    Actually, you're thinking of Dirtstar and it's IGAD (Involuntary so on and so forth). Caltron just has a screaming mad bubble factory known as herpes to go along with his HIV and Hep A/B/C.
    Carlton: The Sesame Street of sexually transmitted disease.

  12. #72
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    Quote Originally Posted by southside View Post
    Caltron just has a screaming mad bubble factory known as herpes to go along with his HIV and Hep A/B/C.
    At least he's in the game. You, however, were voted most likely to be found alone, mummified in a studio stacked to the ceiling with National Geographics and Archie Comics.

    -

  13. #73
    Quote Originally Posted by 32green View Post
    At least he's in the game. You, however, were voted most likely to be found alone, mummified in a studio stacked to the ceiling with National Geographics and Archie Comics.

    -
    I was thinking an abandoned shed behind a local cable access channel. But, yeah, okay.

  14. #74
    So close. It would be a music studio and I don't read comics. Comics are ghey. Superheros are for Superzeroes. The alone part is quite possible as I wonder if I'm long term relationship material.

  15. #75
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    Quote Originally Posted by 32green View Post


    Nothing was more brutal than the ethnic slurs between Irish and Italian friends when I was growing up. I still have friends who cant text me about the most mundane thing without using terms like mick, donkey, bogman, bog-chimp, harp etc.

    THese are middle-aged professional men.

    -
    My best friends name is McCabe Gallagher. Hes a stupid druken toothless Mick who fancys himself a brawler. Truth he's just an Irishman nothing more nothing less. Poor ****

  16. #76
    Quote Originally Posted by thebigragu View Post
    My best friends name is McCabe Gallagher. Hes a stupid druken toothless Mick who fancys himself a brawler. Truth he's just an Irishman nothing more nothing less. Poor ****
    Redundant?

  17. #77
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    The irish are drunk but standing

    Italian soccer players are sober, but laying on the ground holding their heads

    Ironing

  18. #78
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    Quote Originally Posted by 32green View Post
    At least he's in the game. You, however, were voted most likely to be found alone, mummified in a studio stacked to the ceiling with National Geographics and Archie Comics.

    -
    Lol and love letters never mailed.

  19. #79
    Quote Originally Posted by Timmy® View Post
    The irish are drunk but standing

    Italian soccer players are sober, but laying on the ground holding their heads

    Ironing
    Biggest quiffs in all of sport.

  20. #80
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    Quote Originally Posted by Borgoguy View Post
    Redundant?
    Lol nobody ever said I was a scholar now it's clear. " take her to the zoooo Rock"

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