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Thread: OT: A Funny Thing Happened On The Stoop

  1. #1
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    i'm posting this again because one of the moderators earlier moved it to the "Everthing Else" forum, which is basically like exiling a thread. I didn't think it deserved to be moved, especially considering I labeled it OT in the Title. I feel too many people on this forum would miss out on reading this story, so here it is again. this is a repeated thread from about 12 noon. if you've already read it, go ahead and read it again. i'm still real amped up about it, straight vigilante style. well here you go, fans. ----- Sea Captain McCallister

    >>>> this morning around ten o clock, i had just woken up and I was having my early morning stog on my stoop on Eastchester Rd. in New Rochelle. all of a sudden i see coming from the right down the block some kid running down the sidewalk at full speed on my side of the street, and then i see like 30 yards behind him a cop chasing him. the first thing i thought was : i gotta clothesline this guy, he'll never
    see it coming. then i realized the kid was kind of young, like 14-16 maybe, around 6'0'', but i think he was young. so anyways, as he gets close to my stoop, I jump off and take like 3 running leaps towards the kid and laid him out shoulder to shoulder. mind you, i'm only like 5'7'' and 135 pounds. but the kid went flying, right into eastchester rd and a bunch of s**t he was carrying went flying too. i'll admit i was real dazed for a second, my glasses went flying off and the cigarette went flying too and i had fallen in a puddle (it was raining at this point). the kid got up and stumbled like 10 yards before the cop finally caught up with him and tackled him. 5 seconds later 2 blue and white cruisers fly out of nowhere, they cuff the kid and throw him in the back of one of them. the beat cop all out of breath comes over to thank me and told me i laid a real nice lick on that kid. i said it was too early to have to run after some punk kid. turns out he was a juvenile runaway; i thought maybe he robbed something or stabbed someone. i felt kind of bad for blowin the kid up, considering he was running from the cops and probably would have made a clean getaway if i hadn't leaped off the stoop and ray mickens'd his ass. but i got to keep the stuff that he fumbled; a half eaten jar of peanut butter and a juice box. that's always a plus.

    what a crazy way to start the day..

  2. #2
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    Not sure what took bigger balls,the tackle or reposting this on the main forum?

    My money says this thread has a 7 minutes life span.

  3. #3
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    :lol: Awesome story. I would have taken the kid out too only I'm not 5'7" 135. :lol: As I get older I become less and less tolerant of high school kids and would have jumped at the opportunity to smack one senseless and actually get away with it.

  4. #4
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    [quote][i]Originally posted by Smizzy[/i]@Sep 28 2004, 08:12 PM
    [b]

    My money says this thread has a 7 minutes life span. [/b][/quote]

    Damn Smizz, we agree on something.

    The question is how fast does Bob stumble all over his Kerry paraphernalia before he gets a chance to delete or lock the thread?

  5. #5
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    [quote][i]Originally posted by Alk[/i]@Sep 28 2004, 08:15 PM
    [b] :lol: Awesome story. I would have taken the kid out too only I'm not 5'7" 135. :lol: As I get older I become less and less tolerant of high school kids and would have jumped at the opportunity to smack one senseless and actually get away with it. [/b][/quote]
    5'7 135?????? are you kidding me?

    Drink some milk short stack.

  6. #6
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    [quote][i]Originally posted by Smizzy[/i]@Sep 28 2004, 08:18 PM
    [b]
    5'7 135?????? are you kidding me?

    Drink some milk short stack. [/b][/quote]

    As Momma Vilma said to her son.

  7. #7
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    holy crap CAPtain ! way to go ...you dah man dada! :D

  8. #8
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    [quote][i]Originally posted by Alk[/i]@Sep 28 2004, 08:15 PM
    [b] :lol: Awesome story. I would have taken the kid out too only I'm not 5'7" 135. :lol: As I get older I become less and less tolerant of high school kids and would have jumped at the opportunity to smack one senseless and actually get away with it. [/b][/quote]
    5'7" 135???

    I thought that was the average size of Nebraska's starting Offensive Line??

  9. #9
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    [quote][i]Originally posted by Smizzy+Sep 28 2004, 07:18 PM--></div><table border='0' align='center' width='95%' cellpadding='3' cellspacing='1'><tr><td>[b]QUOTE[/b] (Smizzy @ Sep 28 2004, 07:18 PM)</td></tr><tr><td id='QUOTE'> <!--QuoteBegin-Alk[/i]@Sep 28 2004, 08:15 PM
    [b] :lol: Awesome story. I would have taken the kid out too only I&#39;m not 5&#39;7" 135. :lol: As I get older I become less and less tolerant of high school kids and would have jumped at the opportunity to smack one senseless and actually get away with it. [/b][/quote]
    5&#39;7 135?????? are you kidding me?

    Drink some milk short stack. [/b][/quote]
    No, that&#39;s how big he said he was. I&#39;m just a little bit bigger than that. No milk but beer has been very very good to me. :lol:

  10. #10
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    [quote][i]Originally posted by Smizzy[/i]@Sep 28 2004, 08:18 PM
    [b]
    5&#39;7 135?????? are you kidding me?

    Drink some milk short stack. [/b][/quote]
    yeah i&#39;ll admit im kinda a boney kid, but its in my genes when my dad got married to my mom at 25 he weighed 130 pounds, and he&#39;s 5&#39;10&#39;&#39;. my mom is only five foot, so i&#39;ve been doomed to a life of being the scrawny kid who always gets injured. i&#39;m surprised i got this kid as good as I did, i mean he was running full speed; the fastest he&#39;s probably ran his entire life cause he&#39;s running from the cops, and I didn&#39;t have much room to really sprint. i think it helped that I left my feet and kind of like torpedoed him with my shoulder, plus i don&#39;t think he saw it coming or expected it. the kool aid pouch and the peanut butter jar went flying pretty far, but he really went down hard - if there was a car coming he was a goner. its a pretty busy road and at 10 am its usually a lot more crowded. it would have been better if he was a criminal, instead of some kid who just ran away from home and happened to get blasted by a 23 year old college senior while running from the po-lice. oh well, his parents are probably glad to have him home anyways. i did my part for the day.

  11. #11
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    Next time you tackle, WRAP HIM UP&#33;

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    Good story Captain. When I was kid my father was a Paterson Cop. He moonlighted with a construction business and we were returning an old station wagon to the impound from whence my father "borrowed" it to deliver some materials. As we came down Temple hill, I saw a lanky dude running for his life with two uniformed housing cops lagging behind him. I pointed it out to my old man and he swung around the block and laid an ambush on the guy as he was crossing a lot between the projects. Flattened the dude, knee in back, off-duty .380 pointed at the back of his head. When the housing guys came up panting, they weren&#39;t happy. Nightsticks and flashlights, man. Pretty cool for a twelve year old(at the time of course) kid to see his pop in action. Your story brought it right back.

  13. #13
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    [quote][i]Originally posted by Jet Addict SouthFL[/i]@Sep 28 2004, 09:50 PM
    [b] Next time you tackle, WRAP HIM UP&#33; [/b][/quote]
    Sounds like the Sea Captain is a lot like our own John McGraw - all blast, no wrap.

  14. #14
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    [quote][i]Originally posted by Sea Captain McCallister[/i]@Sep 28 2004, 09:01 PM
    [b] so anyways, as he gets close to my stoop, I jump off and take like 3 running leaps towards the kid and laid him out shoulder to shoulder. [/b][/quote]
    Congrats, you officially have the same number of open field tackles as Prime Time has had in his entire NFL career&#33;

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    [quote][i]Originally posted by BergenJet+Sep 28 2004, 08:59 PM--></div><table border='0' align='center' width='95%' cellpadding='3' cellspacing='1'><tr><td>[b]QUOTE[/b] (BergenJet @ Sep 28 2004, 08:59 PM)</td></tr><tr><td id='QUOTE'> <!--QuoteBegin-Sea Captain McCallister[/i]@Sep 28 2004, 09:01 PM
    [b] so anyways, as he gets close to my stoop, I jump off and take like 3 running leaps towards the kid and laid him out shoulder to shoulder. [/b][/quote]
    Congrats, you officially have the same number of open field tackles as Prime Time has had in his entire NFL career&#33; [/b][/quote]
    Ha- you sure feel like a man today, don&#39;t you?

  16. #16
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    [quote][i]Originally posted by No1JetFan[/i]@Sep 28 2004, 11:00 PM
    [b] Ha- you sure feel like a man today, don&#39;t you? [/b][/quote]
    Why shouldn&#39;t he, I think it is pretty cool. I know most police officers would appreciate the help. He did a good deed. ;)

  17. #17
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    [quote][i]Originally posted by BergenJet+Sep 28 2004, 10:04 PM--></div><table border='0' align='center' width='95%' cellpadding='3' cellspacing='1'><tr><td>[b]QUOTE[/b] (BergenJet @ Sep 28 2004, 10:04 PM)</td></tr><tr><td id='QUOTE'> <!--QuoteBegin-No1JetFan[/i]@Sep 28 2004, 11:00 PM
    [b] Ha- you sure feel like a man today, don&#39;t you? [/b][/quote]
    Why shouldn&#39;t he, I think it is pretty cool. I know most police officers would appreciate the help. He did a good deed. ;) [/b][/quote]
    Would of sucked if the guy just shot someone, he jumps off the stoop and takes the bullet for the muderer.

  18. #18
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    i would feel a whole lot better if it wasn&#39;t some 15 year old kid with emotional problems and family issues. it does make it funnier that it was just a runaway, though. and that kool aid was good, but im throwing the peanut butter away.

  19. #19
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    i am so sore today. i think i got whiplash..

  20. #20
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    [quote][i]Originally posted by GreenBeans[/i]@Sep 28 2004, 09:49 PM
    [b] all blast, no wrap. [/b][/quote]
    :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol:

    great one, man.

    perfect way to describe him.

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