Soaring on the wings of a demon in New Hampshire, Dio shocked supporters today when he announced his running mate at this early stage of the campaign. It may come as a surprised to supporters, but riding the tiger alongside Dio to the whitehouse will be Ozzy Osborne.
After years trading spots leading Sabbath the two patched things up and agreed it was time to take the country back to its hellish roots for the children of the night. "I know kindness from evil" said Dio to a packed room "and Ozzy is the ****ing devil himself." Ozzy responded with "buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, but I, I, I, I'm not sure if I can d, d, d, do it." and followed it up with another 45 seconds of incoherent babbling.
They also unveiled new bumper stickers, signs, and shirts proclaiming "Even bigger than Sabbath: Vote Dio and Ozzy in '04!"