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Thread: OT: Opinions wanted

  1. #1
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    OT: Opinions wanted

    As I'm waiting for the CHargers Colts game to start yesterday, I'm flipping through the paper and see this:

    Should a painful secret be shared or spared?

    Rabbi Marc Gellman & Msgr. Thomas Hartman | The God Squad
    January 12, 2008

    A marriage of 58 years and three children ended recently when my wife died of kidney failure. Before her death, while awaiting surgery, she revealed for the first time that a close family friend had fathered one of our children, and then she named which one. Another of our children was present and heard this confession. My wife's grave condition precluded any discussion. My long, loving relationship with my wife helped lower the hurt level, and doing the right thing trumps everything. My children are in their early 50s. I'm 85 and the child's real father is 86. Time is of the essence if the father-child connection is ever to be made. Pandora's box, once opened, would produce consequences, but I'm urged to honor and reveal the facts to "my child." Continued subterfuge would maintain familial equilibrium, but is telling the truth the correct solution?
    ----------------------------------

    So , am I the only one who thinks the writer is a sucka and should have spit in her face? Besides the "close family friend" part, she waits until she just about to meet her Maker to drop this bomb? Great - she feels better, but has thrown her family into chaos?

    Opinions? What would you do in that situation?

  2. #2
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    deathbed confessions happen all of the time. He's doing the right thing IMHO. His son has the right to know.

  3. #3
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    We all might feel different when we're 85...

    Maybe Tex can answer this one. :-)

  4. #4
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    By the time your 50 I think you should be comfortable with yourself. So your
    Dad is Uncle Bill, big deal.

  5. #5
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    Quote Originally Posted by quantum View Post
    So , am I the only one who thinks the writer is a sucka and should have spit in her face? Besides the "close family friend" part, she waits until she just about to meet her Maker to drop this bomb? Great - she feels better, but has thrown her family into chaos?
    Life is long and mistakes are made. Deal with TRUTH no matter what it is.

  6. #6
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    Quote Originally Posted by quantum View Post
    ----------------------------------

    So , am I the only one who thinks the writer is a sucka and should have spit in her face?
    How old are you kid?
    the guy in the story, which may or not be true, is 85 yrs old. Things change.

  7. #7
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    My Great Grandmother made a deathbed confession to my Grandmother that makes that one look like child's play.

    Knowing makes the family history complete. I think it's necessary.

  8. #8
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    Quote Originally Posted by FoxboroFanatic2 View Post
    Life is long and mistakes are made. Deal with TRUTH no matter what it is.
    So Tom Brady should tell his kids he's really gay.

  9. #9
    I think he should sit down and figure out a bill. He should give it to the family friend and tell him this is how much he owes you for raising his kid.

  10. #10
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    let it die with her death. Knowing this information holds no value in being shared.

    MOga III

  11. #11
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    Quote Originally Posted by FoxboroFanatic2 View Post
    Life is long and mistakes are made. Deal with TRUTH no matter what it is.
    hence the reason the guy should've dealt with the truth by spitting in his deceased wife's face....I mean come on already....you're on your way out then you drop a bomb like that???

  12. #12
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    Quote Originally Posted by crazyeffinjetsfan View Post
    My Great Grandmother made a deathbed confession to my Grandmother that makes that one look like child's play.

    well???

  13. #13
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    Tell the truth...

    The 50 year old man knows who is father is... that wont change...

    But if was important enough for the mother to say, then it's important to pass along the truth of where the mans genetics come from.

  14. #14
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    Quote Originally Posted by FrankMoga View Post
    let it die with her death. Knowing this information holds no value in being shared.

    MOga III
    +1

    His only problem is another son heard the info. Let's hope he has alzheimers and can play as if he can't remember.

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    Quote Originally Posted by Come Back to NY View Post
    hence the reason the guy should've dealt with the truth by spitting in his deceased wife's face....I mean come on already....you're on your way out then you drop a bomb like that???
    Yes, "spitting in his deceased wife's face" would help the situation.

    I have been in enough hospital rooms to know that ALOT of stuff comes out at that time. Thats just the way it is.

  16. #16
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    No matter what you do, you raised that child. You are the father. They will love You as their father. Remember, you did nothing wrong. Ask your sibling that was there what he/she thinks. They know your family better then any one else. Draw from their opinion. I wish you all the luck in the world. Sorry for your loss.

  17. #17
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    Quote Originally Posted by Jets Fanatic View Post
    How old are you kid?
    the guy in the story, which may or not be true, is 85 yrs old. Things change.
    46. I have this thing about loyalty and integrity.

    Also: I never said anything about the kid, just about the infidelity part.

  18. #18
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    What a whore!

  19. #19
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    Quote Originally Posted by crazyeffinjetsfan View Post
    My Great Grandmother made a deathbed confession to my Grandmother that makes that one look like child's play.
    Such a build up, and then such a let down when you didn't say what it was....

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    Quote Originally Posted by Come Back to NY View Post
    well???

    +1

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